Inside January 2022 Courageous Truths: Courage Begins Coconut Prenatal Care during Covid-19 Pandemic Happy New Year! 2022 Looks Good on You! 1
Hesitant to get the vaccine? You’re not alone. But we can find the answers. Together. www.unitedwaydm.org/vaxdsm
SUMMARY 6 10 25 Join our email club at: joindsmurban@gmail.com Submit your news to: dsmurbannews@gmail.com Become a Outlet for Urban: contactdsmurban@gmail.com 30 3 10 Make Room James Van Der Zee 12 15 24 20 28 30 32 34 CDC’s Shortened Isolation Time Courageous Truths Coconut Prenatal Care during the Covid-19 Pandemic Alzheimer’s Association Happy New Year VAXDSM When Help Knocks
WRITERS & STAFF Editor-In-Chief Dwana Bradley Copy Editor Virgina Smith Contributors Creative Director Nikki Goldman - LosRos Graphix Donnetta Austin Debra Carr Terence Haynes Angela Jackson Celeste Lawson Gary Lawson Bert Moody Lori Young Caleb Thomas Courageous Fire MAGAZINE OUTLETS Broadlawns 1801 Hickman Road, Des Moines, IA 50314 CareMore 1530 East Euclid, Des Moines, Iowa 50313 Central Library 1000 Grand Ave, Des Moines, IA 50309 DMACC Urban Campus 1100 7th Street, Des Moines, IA 50314 DSM Brew Coffee Co. 300 Martin Luther King Jr. Pkwy, Suite 140, Des Moines, Iowa 50309 Drake Diner 1111 25th Street, Des Moines, IA 50311 Eastside Library 2559 Hubbell Ave. Des Moines, Iowa 50317 Evelyn Davis Center 801 Suite #3, University Ave, Des Moines IA 50314 Fields Pharmacy 501 University Ave. Des Moines, IA 50314 Iowa-Nebraska NAACP 1620 Pleseant Suite #210, Des Moines, IA 50314 Forest Library 1326 Forest Ave, Des Moines, IA 50314 Franklin Library 5000 Franklin Ave. Des Moines, Iowa 50310 Hy-Vee 3330 Martin Luther King Jr. Pkwy, Des Moines, IA 50310 John R. Grubb YMCA 11th Street, Des Moines, Iowa 50314 Johnston Library 6700 Merle Hay Rd. Johnston, Iowa 50131 Northside Library 3516 5th Ave. Des Moines, Iowa 50313 Mr. Bibbs 2705 6th Ave, Des Moines, IA 50313 Senior Polk County 2008 Forest Ave, Des Moines IA 50314 Smokey Row Coffee Co. 1910 Cottage Grove, Des Moines, Iowa 50314 Southside Library 1111 Porter Ave. Des Moines, Iowa 50315 The Great Frame Up 5515 Mills Civic Parkway Suite #150, West Des Moines, IA 50266 The Des Moines Civil and Human Rights 602 Robert D. Ray Drive, Des Moines IA 50309 The Urban Dreams 601 Forest Avenue, Des Moines, Iowa 50314 Traditions Grooming Parlor 1111 E. Army Post Road Ste. 154 Urbandale Public Library 3520 86th Street, Urbandale, IA 50322 Urbandale Chamber of Commerce 2830 100th Street, Suite 110, Urbandale, IA 50322 West Des Moines Library 4000 Mills Clive Pkwy, West Des Moines, Iowa 50365 The Zone of Comfort 3829 71st Street, Suite B, Urbandale, IA 50322 Also Available at churches, our directory can be found on our website at dsmurban.org
GET THE URBAN EXPERIENCE E very year goes by quicker than the last one. I pray your New Year has gotten off to a great start. Each year in November/December I reflect over the year. I think about what I’ve done and what is ahead. I contemplate if I should give some things up that I’m involved in, and I do a lot of praying and talking to the Lord. I heard Pastor Mike Todd of Transformation Church say, “It will be your best year if it’s your best year spiritually.” These words have stayed on my heart and it’s my desire for this year to be my best spiritually. There is something about growing spiritually that bring transformation to your life. I’m not sure how people make it without connecting to their faith. There is so much going on in the world and speaking for myself I must focus on reading my Bible and being in prayer. I believe prayer changes things and it’s my plan to exercise my faith more. What are you going to do this year? Is there anyone that you’ve heard speak that has motivated you to do something different? I pray this is your best year. We will get past Covid, and we will come together. I know it seems challenging right now. Troubles don’t last always. Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning. You are more than a conqueror and your faith will move mountains, but do you believe. I do. I pray you do as well. Happy 2022, make it the best year for you. Dwana Bradley Editor in Chief 5
THE GREAT FRAME UP SUPPORTS AFRICAN AMERICAN ARTISTS JANUARY FEATURE: JAMES VAN DER ZEE BY ANGELA M. JACKSON “Positively NO TRUST” -- A slogan commonly seen in stores and saloons in the early decades of the century, meaning, CASH ONLY.
“Being an artist, I had an artist’s instinct. You can see the picure before its taken; then it’s up to you to get the camera to see.” - James Van Der Zee As a local custom frame retailer and art gallery, The Great Frame Up in West Des Moines enjoys supporting the visual arts. This month we introduce readers to American Harlem Renaissance photographer James Van Der Zee. James Van Der Zee (1886-1983) was born in Lenox, Massachusetts and demonstrated an early gift for music, initially aspiring to a career as a professional violinist. His other interest was photography. At the age of fourteen he received his first camera and took hundreds of photographs of his family and the town of Lenox. As one of the first people in the town to own a camera he was able to provide a rich early documentation of community life in small town New England. Van Der Zee moved to New York City in 1906 to work with his father and brother as waiters and elevator operators. By now a skilled pianist and aspiring professional violinist, he was also the primary creator and one of the five performers in a group known as the Harlem Orchestra. In 1915 Van Der Zee moved to Newark, New Jersey where he was employed as a darkroom assistant and later as a photographer in a portrait studio. He returned to New York in 1916 and moved to Harlem just as large numbers of black migrants and immigrants were arriving in that section of the city. He set up his first portrait studio in his sister’s music conservatory and two years later, with his second wife, Gaynella Greenlee, established the Guarantee Photo Studio in Harlem. Quickly Van Der Zee became the most successful photographer in Harlem. Early 20th century black activist Marcus Garvey, black entertainer/dancer Bill “Bojangles” Robinson and renowned black poet Countee Cullen were among his more prominent subjects. By the early 1930s Van Der Zee’s income from his photography work declined partly because of the strained economic 7
circumstances of many of his customers and partly because the growing popularity of personal cameras reduced the need for professional photography. Van Der Zee responded by shooting passport photos, doing photo restorations, and taking other miscellaneous photography jobs, an approach he would employ for over two decades. In 1967 James Van Der Zee’s work was rediscovered by photographers and photo-historians and he then received attention far beyond his Harlem community. Van Der Zee came out of retirement to photograph celebrities who in turn promoted his work in exhibits around the nation. His images were also the subject of books and documentaries. In 1993, the National Portrait Gallery exhibited his work as a posthumous tribute to his remarkable genius. Harlem on My Mind In 1969, VanDerZee gained worldwide recognition when his work was featured in the exhibition, Harlem on My Mind,at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York. His inclusion in the exhibition was somewhat by accident. In December 1967, a researcher for the exhibition (and a photographer in his own right), Reginald McGhee, came across VanDerZee’s Harlem studio and asked if he happened to have any photographs from the 1920s and 30s. In a story recounted by photo historian Rodger C. Birt, VanDerZee showed him the boxes and boxes of negatives he had kept from this period. These photographs would become the core of Harlem on My Mind— and the feature of the exhibit that critics routinely praised as the show’s biggest revelation. As art historian Sharon Patton observed, VanDerZee not only documented the Harlem Renaissance, but also helped create it. Harlem on My Mind marked a controversy between the Met and a number of practicing artists then living and working around Harlem. Painters including Romare Bearden and Benny Andrews protested the show for its emphasis on social history and experience, at the expense—as they viewed it—of interest in the artistic legacy of black New York artists. On opening day, a picket line formed in front of the Met. Andrews carried a sign reading: “Visit The Metropolitan Museum of Photography.” (credits – Howard Greenberg gallery; wikipedia.org) The Great Frame Up currently features originals, prints, sculptures and framed artwork of numerous African American and Iowa artists in the gallery. To see some of the prior artists featured visit www. westdesmoines.thegreatframeup.com and our Facebook page at www.facebook.com/ tgfuwdmiowa. Please follow us on Pinterest www.pinterest.com/tgfuwdm and Twitter @ tgfuwdm.
Art | Memories | Conservation Materials | Commercial & In-Home Consultation 25% Off Custom Framing! *Offer valid until 11/15/2021 West Glen Town Center | 5515 Mills Civic Parkway #150 West Des Moines, IA 50266 | 515-226-2310 | westdesmoines.thegreatframeup.com For millions of prints - shop our online store: shopthegreatframeupart.com You can do ANYTHING! Jan. 7 – 23, 2022 DMPlayhouse.com FOR TICKETS: discover the About The Great Frame Up The Great Frame Up is a custom picture framer, offering more than 1,000 custom frames, mat styles, ready to hang framed art and local artwork. The West Des Moines location of The Great Frame Up opened in 2005 and is located at 5515 Mills Civic Parkway in the West Glen Town Center and is open Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday 10- 6pm; Thursday 108pm & Saturday 10- 5pm. perfect holiday gifts at the art center THE MUSEUM STORE FEATURES GIFTS OF DESIGN | BOOKS | FASHION JEWELRY | TOYS AND GAMES HOME DECOR | HOLIDAY ITEMS GIVE THE GIFT OF ART CLASSES OR ART CENTER MEMBERSHIP FREE ADMISSION EVERY DAY VISIT DESMOINESARTCENTER.ORG 9
SPIRITUALITY MAKE ROOM Written By: Donnetta Austin
7” ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8” For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. NIV Matthew 7:7-8 F ather God my prayer is for those of us who have been in a dry season to come and be replenished. You said that in your word “NIV Matthew 7:7” ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. “Matthew 7:8” For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. Father God I am believing in expectation that “Ephesians 3:20” You are able to do exceedingly abundantly Above all we ask or think. In the Month of January, I believe that you, Lord are wanting to do a new thing. This season is an opportunity for each of us to declutter and make room. It is a perfect time to let go of old habits and create new meaningful customs. One that will help us thrive in our greatness of who you created us to be. I am believing that through you Lord Transformation can take place, mindsets are renewed, healing has taken forth in motion, and Peace surpasses all understanding. Father I believe that you are mighty, powerful, and nothing shall get in the way of what you have destined. When tension or adversity comes along the way it is for our development and growth. God is capable and able to break through any barrier. This too shall come to pass. Miracles happen when we release the hesitation and doubt of what held us back in the past of yesterday. Take the limits off, make room, be happy embracing and loving the new you! 11
EMS CONTRIBUTING EDITOR PUBLIC HEALTH EXPERTS WORRY ABOUT CDC’S SHORTENED ISOLATION TIME FOLLOWING EXPOSURE TO COVID Written By: SUNITA SOHRABJI
“MUDDIEST GUIDELINE EVER!” - DR. ERIC FEIGL-DING P ublic health experts are expressing concern about new Centers for Disease Control guidelines which shorten by half the isolation time after an individual is exposed to Covid. The CDC issued its revised guidelines Dec. 27, recommending that people who have tested positive for Covid isolate for five days, down from the previous 10-day requirement. If they are asymptomatic or their symptoms are resolving, (without a fever for 24 hours, for example), they must follow isolation by 5 days of wearing a mask when around others. No additional testing is required before ending isolation, and the CDC did not define what “resolving” symptoms might be. People who have been exposed to someone with Covid can simply mask for 10 days if they have been boosted, or taken the first set of Pfizer or Moderna vaccine within the last 6 months, or completed the primary series of J&J vaccine within the last 2 months. A test is recommended on the 5th day after exposure. Those who are unvaccinated or have not yet received a booster if they are eligible, must isolate at home for five days — also down from the previous requirement of 10 — after which they must wear a mask around others for an additional five days. A test is recommended on day 5. Unvaccinated people who have been exposed to Covid but cannot quarantine are required to wear a mask when around others. In an interview with the PBS NewsHour Dec. 28, Dr. Mati Hlatshwayo Davis, Director of Health at the City of St. Louis, Missouri Department of Health said public confusion over the new guidelines is warranted. “The job now is on the CDC, on the federal government, and on local health officials to make sure that people understand the science and can make that transition,” she said, noting that implementation of the changes will be slow, because many municipalities do not have the funding to support the recommended testing on the fifth day. Home testing kits are in short supply. Social media exploded as the new guidelines were announced, with some tweeters accusing the CDC of putting corporate profit over best public health practices. Of particular concern is the fact that a follow-up negative test is not required before leaving isolation, leaving individuals to decide for themselves whether their symptoms have resolved. The new guidelines were announced even as the US faces a surge of Covid infections from the Omicron and Delta variants, with an estimated 265,000 new cases per day, with 75,000 hospitalizations and 1,500 daily deaths. “MUDDIEST GUIDELINE EVER!” tweeted Dr. Eric Feigl-Ding, Senior Fellow at the Federation of American Scientists. “Tell me what’s wrong with this CDC rule: it says you can simply leave the house if ‘your symptoms are resolving.’ In what universe is that considered a clear guideline? It’s dangerously muddy.” “People will definitely abuse that vagueness to be blasé and ignore isolation. Businesses will abuse it too — to the detriment of public health,” said Feigl-Ding. The epidemiologist also noted that the Food and Drug Administration Dec. 28 announced that rapid antigen tests are less sensitive for detecting Omicron variant infections. “This could mean we are missing a lot more COVID19. I know many families with everyone having symptoms but (not testing) positive,” he said. Jerome Adams, who served as US Surgeon General during the Trump Administration and now serves as the Health Equity Director at Purdue, tweeted: “Regardless of what CDC says, you really should try to obtain an antigen test (I know: easier said than done) and confirm it is negative prior to leaving isolation and quarantine.” “There’s not a scientist or doctor I’ve met yet who wouldn’t do this for themselves, and their family,” he wrote. Dr. Ashish Jha, Dean of Brown University’s School of Public Health, said that the new CDC guidelines were “a step in the right direction,” but fell somewhat short. “While new CDC isolation guidelines are reasonable, here’s what I would have done differently,” he tweeted. “Required a negative antigen test after 5 days; had different guidelines for vaccinated (contagious for shorter time) versus unvaccinated; and specified higher quality masks.” “The critique appears to be that people won’t follow CDC guidelines; that they will stop isolating after 5 days even with symptoms and/or not wear a mask.” “Yes. That will happen for some. But shorter isolation means lower barrier to test/isolate, which will motivate others to test,” stated Jha. The CDC’s new guidelines can be read here: https://to.pbs.org/3mGW08K 13
“ ...DON’T KNOW THEY’RE BEING VICTIMIZED BECAUSE THE BEHAVIOR FEELS NORMAL TO THEM. “
Courageous TR UTHS COURAGEOUS BEGINS: Beloved, can you believe it? It’s a brand new year already! We endured 2020, began recovery in 2021… what is possible in 2022?! We’ll talk about some incredible possibilities in this article as we step away from the storytelling aspect to set expectations for what you will experience with us this year. If you’ve been keeping up with us for 2021, firstly we thank you. Secondly, we want to further clarify what we were doing to provide a foundational understanding of our work - changing the narrative for Black women dealing with domestic violence (DV). To even understand what the Black woman deals with during DV - and that it’s different from what other women deal with - you have to understand the things we’re actually dealing with and what they look like. Why do women, any women, stay in abuse? How about because many times these women DON’T KNOW THEY’RE BEING VICTIMIZED BECAUSE THE BEHAVIOR FEELS NORMAL TO THEM. After my 2-part interview featured in early 2021 and the May 2021 article introducing our organization, we set out to help our readers understand the lesserknown types of DV, and even shared some of the tactics more often utilized in these types through storytelling. What does that mean? We took the information from our own situation and other Black women we’ve talked to, as well as trusted sources’ information and definitions and personified that into a named character to help you understand the real-life feel of these types of abuse. In June 2021, we talked about emotional abuse and the common tactic of gaslighting1 . In July, we talked about digital stalking. In August, we talked about revenge porn and physical stalking. In September, we talked about sexual coercion and sexual abuse. In October (DV Awareness Month or DVAM) we took 15
a training break regarding lesser-known types of DV and shared our philosophy of making abuse pay you back when we talked about abuse reparations2 . In November, we touched on emotional and digital abuse again while featuring verbal and financial abuse. In December we closed 2021 by covering one of the most hidden forms of DV in the Black community, spiritual/religious abuse3 . A phrase I have heard often in our community when people are specifically speaking about Black women and DV - long before beginning this work and still even now - goes like this: “Black women don’t put up with that mess [DV]. Maybe them white women will put up with that, but not a Black sister. We/They don’t play that. ” That’s an interesting thought. The reputation of the Black woman is that a man could never get away with that with us. Well, if you’re talking about someone walking up to a Black woman and slapping the taste out of her mouth and her just taking it, you’re right. We don’t play that. If you’re talking about a man going out on a date with a Black woman and suddenly slapping the taste out of her mouth and her just taking it, you’re likely right again. We most likely won’t play that either. However… THAT’S NOT HOW IT USUALLY GOES DOWN, Beloved. Most men wouldn’t dare try a Black woman that way. Most men don’t try us THAT way. It’s silly, sloppy, stupid, and just doesn’t happen that way in most cases. However, there is a way that most abusers who approach a Black woman do step to us. They lay down an initial pattern of behavior that gains trust in the areas that most Black women need to have trust established in order to bestow L-O-Y-A-L-T-Y. Once loyalty is given by a Black woman? Very difficult to reverse. So how is that pattern or path laid for Black women? How does THAT look? We’ll spend much of 2022 laying that out through July. We’ll start in this article. Here’s the perpetrator pattern roadmap: L-O-Y-A
1. The connection being established 2. Commitment established 3. Easiest and most believable ruse established 4. Isolation achieved 5. Stronghold that best fits established 6. Establish abuse cycle 7. Repeat, thereby reinforce, the cycle Of course, we’re NOT laying out the perpetrator’s path/pattern without laying out the path for the Black woman to GET OUT. That’s what we’ll spend the remainder of 2022 doing. Here’s that roadmap: 1. How to find the easiest way out 2. How to avoid the hoover vacuum 3. DVAM - the many places of support for the victim AND the survivor 4. How to broaden support 5. How to NOT repeat the cycle Why are we doing this? We know in order to change the narrative for the Black woman, you have to kill the myths she’s up against. In slaughtering those, you lay out a path for her to receive the help she needs with the compassion she deserves. Let’s start with the first part of the pattern laid by the perpetrator against the Black woman: he establishes the connection. Because Black women are taught at a young age that our job is to serve…”fix your brothers’ plates”...”take their coats for them”...”wash that out for them so they can use that”...If you’re a Black woman, you heard that often as a girl. What that taught you was that it was your job to serve and take care of the Black male. You saw respected women elders you knew and loved doing exactly what they were teaching you to do. That normalized it in your mind. OR You grew up in a church-going household, like me, like most of us as Black women. The religion most practiced by the Black culture is Christianity. Most likely the church you went to believed in the Bible as its spiritual guidance in written form. You heard many verses like 1 Corinthians 11:3, “the head of the woman is man”4 own husbands”5 ; and Ephesians 5:22, “wives submit to your ; and even 1 Corinthians 14:34-35, “... women should keep silent in the churches…they are not permitted to speak, but should be in submission… if there is anything they desire to learn, let them ask their husbands at home”6. You heard first ladies say similar things and watched these same ladies hold their tongues while their husbands spoke, even if their husbands weren’t nearly as eloquent or intelligent. A-L-T-Y 17
Because it was preached from the pulpit and lived in the pews, that normalized it in your mind in adult relationships. OR COURAGEO Like most Blacks, you grew up poor. Oh, maybe at first you didn’t realize it because you had friends, or lots of fun in your neighborhood, or great block parties, or innovative parents…but at some point you looked around and said to yourself, “me and everybody I know or grew up with had nothing”. This Washington Post article reminds us that “When one system of economic oppression collapsed, new ones were created to fill the void.”7 When a poor child grows up, the LAST thing they ever want to meet up with again is poverty. A fancy chart with pretty colors was even created, Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, that really helps bring this into focus8. The lowest part of this pyramid, the foundation, the part you gotta pass before you can climb higher - that part includes a human’s most basic needs being fulfilled. A Black woman who lived in poverty will make sure she never ends up without those met again - and certainly will not abide those needs not being met for her children. That’s not you being paranoid, an overachiever, no; that’s what Looking to see whether he sees one of these 3 goodies that will usually work on a Black woman to establish a connection (that is if he’s a predator): 1. Emotional connection - what is she nostalgic about or deeply emotionally connected to or emotionally driven by that he can feign the same connection to 2. Religious connection - what higher being principle(s) is/are she religiously loyal to that he can either pretend to care about that he can use to control her later or simply take notes on and use to control her later 3. Fulfilling a desperate need - what is she worried EVERY Black woman you watched as a child and that you know as an adult will never let happen either. Therefore, it’s normalized. Fast forward. You grew up and became a woman. Now remember, we’re talking about how abusers establish a connection with the Black woman that allows him to lay the groundwork for future, that’s the keyword, future, abuse cycles with her. You’re a grown woman. You meet a man by chance - only it’s NOT chance. He’s been studying you.
about so much that she doesn’t sleep at night? That she has a 2nd job to keep at bay? That she can’t help but obsess about? That she can’t stop talking about? That is the thing he will ride in and rescue her from as the knight in shining armor. THAT’S how it starts, Beloved. The predator that watches her - the Black woman - to see if she seems to be a woman who is strongly driven by 1, 2, or all 3 of the above. Then, he aligns himself. If he is convincing enough he will gain her trust. If he gains her trust, Beloved, he has established the connection, and is now ready to move to the next step of his plan to be able to abuse the beautiful queen we call Black woman. Please keep reading these month by month - Black women need you to understand how it all starts. Blessings. By Courageous Fire DV Advocate & Founder of Courageous Fire, LLC US TRUTHS 1. Courageous Access is our new non-profit, 501(c)3! We are expanding how we change the narrative. The non-profit arm has a mission to provide holistic supportive services to Black female descendants of slaves who have experienced domestic and or intimate partner violence; promoting pathways of healing through self-reliance and healthy legacy. You are welcome to make your tax-deductible donation right here: Donate 2. Courageous Access and Courageous Fire, LLC will be differentiated by one being the entity that serves the women and the other being the woman who speaks, trains, etc. Over the course of the next 12 months, you will see the programming from the LLC moving over to the non-profit. 3. Courageous Access already has a job opening! We are looking for a grant writing intern. Click here to apply for our job posting right on Facebook or click to access the PDF of the job posting if you are not on Facebook 4. Great news, DV Survivors! Now there is a place you can go to find out what is best to do in the first 30 days after separation from the abuser!! I will continue to convert my life experience into educational currency, and this is no different. Click right here to see an excerpt from the Day #1 and sign up at the same time: Subscribe to Beyond the Abuse 5. If you’re not a survivor and just want to keep up with what’s going on, here’s how to subscribe to our newsletter: CFire LLC Blog News 6. In a relationship? Make sure it’s healthy: Healthy Relationship Wheel Illustration. Or go to TheHotline. org, or Phone: 800-799-7233 7. In an abusive relationship? a. Call us to get connected to a Community Safe Space to begin safety planning, 515-428-0077 b. At the Community Safe Space, talk to The Hotline. org to commence safety planning 8. Survivor and stable in your new life? Sign up for Empowerment through the Arts™; avoid future DV cycles: Survivor Support Endnotes 1. Gaslighting definition 2. See our “Philosophy” at cfirellc.com 3. See “Types of DV Abuse” at cfirellc.com for more information on the abuse definitions 4. 1 Cor 11:3 NIV Translation 5. Eph 5:22 ESV Translation 6. 1 Cor 14:34-35 ESV Translation 7. WashingtonPost.com article: “Why the racial wealth gap persists more than 150 years after emancipation” 8. Chart of American Psychologist, Abraham 19
COCONUT Written By: Arturo Rodriquez What made me a “coconut?”... I remember when I was younger, a friend of mine once described as a “coconut.” It was weird for me to be called such a thing because, at first, I didn’t understand what he was trying to say. I wasn’t sure if that was an insult, or some sort of joke. If you ‘ve never been called such a thing, allow me to elaborate. When looking at a coconut, you will see a fruit covered by a hard brown outer shell. Within the coconut lies a fibrous white layer of meat called the copra. To put it simply, the coconut is brown on the outside, and white on the inside. I wasn’t sure what to make of the analogy at first. Should I be insulted? Looking back, I probably should have been at the time. However, I laughed and agreed with my friend that I am a “coconut.” That was my first big mistake. What made me a “coconut?” I am the son of Mexican immigrants. I was born in the small Chicago suburb, Winfield, Illinois., and spent most of childhood growing up in a small town called Warrenville. I went to mostly White high schools in the nearby area. Most of my childhood, I spoke mostly English rather than Spanish as I saw the former Part 2
being the more useful language to speak. I spoke English almost everywhere I went, even in my own home. Because of my preference to speak one language over the other, my skills in speaking Spanish declined and I struggled with the language. I found myself stuttering, or just making up words in order to talk to my parents. Almost all of my family had given up on trying to teach me by the time I made it to high school. One thing my friend pointed out about me is that a I am not a stereotypical Mexican. I do agree that I am not a stereotype. I found myself not liking many of the things a lot of the Hispanic kids liked at my age. For starters, a good portion of the Hispanic kids I knew were very into soccer. You can tell I’m not as into the sport since I still call it soccer. Soccer is very popular all over the world, especially with Mexicans. It’s their favorite sport. It was never my favorite sport. I found it very boring to be honest, but to each their own. I never had an accent. I felt that many Hispanic kids had some sort of accent. Even the Chicanos had an accent. However, I sound like any Midwesterner. That was something I noticed about myself when I was young. That many of the other kids that I grew up with had this accent that I could never really replicate. That is mostly because that is not who I am. I grew up with privileges as well. Like many other children of immigrants, I was granted citizenship upon birth. Compare that to my parents. For the many of individuals who immigrated here, including my parents, they have requirements. These are the requirements that were listed on the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services website: • Be at least 18 years of age at the time you file the application; • Have been a lawful permanent resident for the past three or five years (depending on which naturalization category you are applying under); • Have continuous residence and physical presence in the United States; • Be able to read, write, and speak basic English; • Demonstrate good moral character; • Demonstrate a knowledge and understanding of U.S. history and government; • Demonstrate a loyalty to the principles of the U.S. Constitution; and • Be willing to take the Oath of Allegiance. Now compare that to me. The only requirement I needed to become a citizen is to be born here. I don’t need to do any of these things. It makes me feel guilty since my parents have to go through so much in order to become citizens, and yet they sacrificed so much so that I can be set for life. Struggle Most of my struggles with being Mexican American began to emerge once I entered high school. The biggest struggle I had was figuring out who I was as a person. The conflict with being a Mexican American is the struggle to please the people on both sides. You have to impress both the Mexicans and the Americans. You can’t do one or the other. If you try, you’ll an important side of yourself and you’ll end up hurt. I learned that the hard way. By the time I was a sophomore in high school, I had given up on the Mexican culture. I admit. I wanted to leave the culture, and that mindset was the biggest mistake of my life. I had lost touch with my people, culture, friends I once made, and my family. I became ignorant and chose to seclude this part of my identity and make it meaningless. What’s worse is that I did it for White people. For a time in my life, I embraced the American side of myself too much and had managed to convince myself to be something that I am not. For what felt to be a long time, I believed that I 21
COCONUT was a White person. I admitted to people that I was White, even though I wasn’t. People laughed at me, and they were right to do so. I was so foolish to believe such delusion. It was mostly because I was tired of being told that I am not “good enough” to be Mexican. To this day, I still don’t know what that means. However, many within the community, including a good portion of my family, thought I wasn’t. They kept making fun of my struggles with trying to be one of them. Rather than help, they would watch me fail over and over again. This made me hate the culture. The fact that people in my own family thought I wasn’t good enough made me think that I wasn’t welcome in the community. I gave up on them. They hurt me, so why would I choose to be associated with them. I went to White people, and for a while, I was fine. I soon started to realize that not many of them were there for me. I reached for them for help, but as it turns out, they weren’t there most of the time. I couldn’t fit in with the Americans. I couldn’t fit in with the Mexicans, let alone my own family. I couldn’t go back to my own family for help because of the shame I felt. They wouldn’t understand. They would have mocked me… or so I thought. I found myself in a hole. A hole with a sole inhabitant… me. There was no one else. No one… but me. I am alone. Moving on There I was… in the metaphorical hole called “loneliness.” Wanting to be free but knew no one would come to help. What is one to do in that situation? My only solution was simple. Better said than done. Pull myself out. How am I to do that? What do I need to do? Where do I go from there? The options seemed so limited just a while back, but now appear to be limitless. But first, how do I help myself. Well… I decided to stop caring what other people think. Others’ words will only carry the weight that you give them. So why give them any. I can understand that some words carry the weights of generations of struggle and conflict. So, I understand if people are offended by others’ words. In my case, however, when it comes to who I am, no one else knows who I am but me. I stopped caring, and it worked. No one could hurt me. No one could take my identity from me. Not Americans. Not Mexicans. Not even my family. No matter what they say, or what they think, it doesn’t bother me. As for my family, as much as I want to go off on them for making me feel less than I am, I still love them. I can move away from the past and forgive them, because no matter what, I go back to them for anything. I will say this, it helps to get away from the places where you have been hurt. Explore a little and find where you belong. Give yourself a fresh start and find new people to interact
with. You can tell them who you are without the fear of prejudice from others. And for those you do meet that are problematic, you can choose to cut them out. Sometimes, it is for the better. Epilogue One show I recall watching from childhood is The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. In one episode, Will and Carlton try to get into a fraternity. Will has no issue getting into the brotherhood, but Carlton is viewed as not good enough for the fraternity despite putting in a lot of work for the group. When being called a “bel-air, prep boy, sell-out,” Carton delivered the most beautiful speech I ever heard in my young life. “Being black isn’t what I’m trying to be, it’s what I am. I’m running the same race and jumping the same hurdles you are, so why are you tripping me up? You said we need to stick together but you don’t even know what that means. If you ask me, you’re the real sellout.” – Alfonso Ribeiro as Carlton Banks, The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (1990-1996) I’ve never heard something so inspirational in my before. The fact that despite being called out by his own people, Carlton stood his ground, and chose to be himself over something he is not. It still gives me chills hearing him say this. I’m not Black, but that message meant something to me. The message transcends race and generation. No matter what, no one can take away how Mexican or American I am. They don’t know who I am trying to be and should never question who I say to be. I am not White, nor a “Coconut.” I am who I am, and I am proud of it. Inspired by a great leader, Bright College is taking a new approach to education. Want to do school differently? So do we. Our two-year associate degrees are designed to accelerate your career. drake.edu/bright
Broadlawns Medical Center Prenatal Care during the COVID-19 Pandemic Written By: Amy Bingaman, MD P regnancy is a special time full of excitement to welcome a new addition into your family. However pregnancy is also a time of great change to your body, which requires extra care. This extra care, known as prenatal care, is the foundation of a healthy pregnancy, labor, and delivery. COVID-19 has made it more important than ever to start early in addressing both your physical and mental prenatal care. In a time of continued uncertainty, here are a few action steps you can take to help to ensure a healthy outcome for you and your baby. 1. Follow the recommended COVID-19 mitigation strategies. CDC data shows that people who are pregnant or recently pregnant are more likely to get severely ill with COVID-19 than those who are not. More than 125,000 COVID-19 cases have been reported in pregnant Americans throughout the pandemic. Of those, more than 22,000 were hospitalized and 161 died. In August alone, 21 pregnant women died. To protect you and your baby from COVID-19, it is important that you wear a mask, wash your hands often, and avoid ill people. We recommend a COVID-19 vaccination, especially in pregnancy. There is currently no evidence that the COVID-19 vaccine causes fertility problems, or that the vaccination is not safe or effective to take during pregnancy. COVID-19 can be particularly dangerous for unborn babies. The CDC found that COVID-19 increases the risk of a stillbirth. A JAMA study found a pregnant individual with COVID-19 is 22 times more likely to have a preterm birth, which can be detrimental to a baby’s development 2. Prioritize your mental health care. Pregnancy brings a mix of feelings, and not all
25
of them are good. If you’re feeling worried, you’re not alone. Worry is common. On top of the traditional bag of emotions, you are now likely also feeling heightened anxiety about the impacts of COVID-19 on your health and the health of your family. A recent Kaiser Family Foundation poll found that nearly half of adults in the US reported their mental health has been negatively impacted by the COVID-19 pandemic. Early research indicates that pregnant individuals and new parents are even more vulnerable to the negative impact as they are facing isolation, potential changes in birth plans, access to health care, and other social determinants of health challenges. Around 20% of pregnant people experience anxiety or depression during their pregnancy. Depression can be debilitating. It is important to talk to your doctor about steps you can take early in your pregnancy to cope with your perinatal mental health and possible postpartum depression. 3. Follow basic prenatal care guidance. Prenatal care should start as early as possible – ideally, before you even get pregnant. Taking care of your health can not only make your pregnancy healthier and easier, but also help to ensure your child is healthy throughout their life. A few tips for this include: - Start following a balanced diet and getting regular exercise. A healthy lifestyle will get your pregnancy off to a good start by reducing your risk of potentially serious pregnancy complications, such as gestational diabetes. - Go to the doctor early and regularly. These visits will give your doctor time to review your medical conditions and prescriptions to spot any possible problems for the health of your baby, as well as a plan to address them. - Start taking folic acid every day. Ideally you should start taking 400 to 800 micrograms of folic acid prior to getting pregnant. This will reduce your risk of birth defects of the brain and spine. - In addition to the COVID-19 vaccination, you should get your flu vaccination and any other vaccinations that need to be updated. - Stop smoking and drinking alcohol. If you need support with your prenatal care, Broadlawns Medical Center is here to help. The Broadlawns OB/GYN Clinic is committed to helping individuals of all ages receive the healthcare that they need at every stage of their lives. Our team of expert providers are dedicated to excellence, compassion, and personalized care. Broadlawns OB/GYN services are available at our Main Campus, as well as at our Cityville Clinic and East University Clinic. All forms of insurance accepted. To learn more or to schedule an appointment, visit www.broadlawns.org or call (515) 282-2340.
Syphilis is on the rise in Iowa. Syphilis is a sexually transmitted infection. Early numbers show a 75% increase in syphilis cases in Iowa from 2020 to 2021. It’s more common and easier to get than you might think. Syphilis is curable but can cause serious health problems without treatment. Talk to your doctor about whether you are at risk. Find a testing location near you: gettested.cdc.gov Free and low cost options available 27
ALZHEIMER’S ASSOCIATION: Iowa Chapter Tips to Help Families Facing Alzheimer’s Plan for Financial Impact During Financial Wellness Month By Lauren Livingston Alzheimer’s Association: The Alzheimer’s Association wants to remind families of the importance of financial planning during Financial Wellness Month in January. After a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s or other dementia, financial planning often gets pushed aside because of the stress and fear this topic evokes. However, you can reduce stress by planning ahead. The Association offers tips to help reduce the financial stress and ways to proactively plan for the financial impact of Alzheimer’s and dementia. Some of these tips include: • Look at retirement planning as a time to think about how to prepare for the need for long-term medical care. After an Alzheimer’s diagnosis, your options may be more limited. • Conduct an inventory of your financial resources (savings, insurance, retirement benefits, government assistance, VA benefits, etc.). A financial planner or elder care attorney can help. • Understand the role and limitations of Medicare, Medicaid and other insurance options. An Alzheimer’s Association report found that nearly two out of three people incorrectly believe that Medicare helps pay for nursing home care, or were unsure whether it did. Disease-related costs can jeopardize a family’s financial security causing many families and caregivers to make enormous personal and financial sacrifices. The 2021 Alzheimer’s Association Alzheimer’s Disease Facts and Figures report found some staggering results: • In 2020, the lifetime cost of care for a person living with dementia was $373,527. • Average out-of-pocket costs for health care and long-term care services not covered by Medicare, Medicaid and private insurance exceed $11,500 annually.
• Nearly half (48 percent) of care contributors must cut back on their own expenses – including basic necessities like food, transportation and medical care – to afford dementia-related care, while others must draw from their own savings or retirement funds. A number of financial resources may be available to help cover care costs. Some may apply now and others in the future. Financial resources include: • Medicare, Medicare Part D and Medigap • Insurance, including life and long-term care • Employee or retirement benefits • Personal assets such savings, investments and property • Veterans benefits • Medicaid • Supplemental Security Income (SSI) or Social Security Disability Insurance (SSDI), if you are younger than 65 • Community support services, such as Meals on Wheels, respite care and transportation services. To find services, use our free Community Resource Finder. For more information visit the Alzheimer’s Association’s Financial Planning page. 29
Mental Health: Happy New Year! Written By: Caleb Thomas M.A. LMHC
H appy Blessed New Year! I pray this is your greatest year yet! In January, we look forward to making New Year Resolutions, we also honor and celebrate the birth of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. What comes to my mind as we celebrate his birthday this year is how would Dr. King lead if he was still alive today? What would he think regarding our growth and progress as African Americans today? One difficult topic I believe he would address is: Black on Black crime. Dr. King would address this issue as a lot of Black-on-Black crime stems from a lack of fatherhood, a lack of education, goals, and poverty, this can lead to a higher disproportion of imprisonment for young Black men. Our New Year Resolutions should include bettering ourselves and our communities. If we want to keep Dr. King’s dream alive, we must get out of our comfort zone and make a difference. Growing up without a father was very difficult, even though I attended a church with prominent men of color. Our church never had mentor programs for young boys growing up, so temptations were easy to fall into. (Titus 2:6-7) tells us “To encourage the young men to be self-controlled in everything, set an example by doing what is good”. In our teaching show integrity and seriousness”. If the young men aren’t seeing these examples, many will follow bad examples. For instance, young men who wear their pants below their waste, it’s not that they are trying to be cool but a lack of identity. Contrary to most beliefs, our fathers are the ones to give us identity by how they lead and set an example for us. We know the stats on single parenthood; however, the lack of an earthly role model can still be learned as we have the best example of how to be a father from our Heavenly Father God. Dr. King’s dream is still alive. We see it unfolding: Blacks can attend schools of their choice, live where they want, date & marry who they want, we have better laws against discrimination based on one’s skin color, religious beliefs and more. Dr. King wanted us to have these rights and be a better people. Better how? Dr. King and great leaders fought so our children could have access to equal education, he knew education was key. Today our youth graduate from high school straight to prison, this was not part of his dream. We know Dr. King fought against racism, but ask yourself, how did we get to the point of Black-onBlack crime, from the streets of Des Moines to Chicago, we know it exists, the question is how to stop it? (Mark 12:31) God’s 2nd commandmentlove your neighbor as yourself. Part of the problem is self-hate, if I have self-hate then it’s going to be easier to hate my neighbor which in turn makes it easy to kill my neighbor. We must teach self-love at home. As parents we need to tell our children how smart they are, who they can become and how beautiful our Black sons and daughters are. Life and death are in the power of the tongue (Prov 18:21). As a parent I have learned that children need to stay active, and involved, teach them early, life is not just about themselves. They can serve in the church, or volunteer for the elderly in the community to learn how to show kindness. Help them understand the importance of education, be an advocate for education and teachers, remember our children are gifted and have many hidden talents. Volunteer to help our youth, it can help change the trajectory of their future. I believe Dr. King would say we can do better. Ask yourself what dream do you have for your children? I don’t know any parent who has dreams for their child to join a gang, become a drug dealer, a thief, or a high school drop-out. This year 2022, let’s share Dr. Kings’ dream with our children the whole year. We can all help, we’ve heard the saying “it takes a village to raise a child”. Let’s work together to see our Black youth go to college not prison, teach self-love, and eliminate Black on Black crime. So, be a role model, a mentor, get involved or volunteer for our schools. If Dr. King was still alive, this is the work he would be doing to ensure his dream becomes a reality. Caleb Thomas M.A. LMHC 319 206-0651 thomasacc.com Thomas & Associates Counseling & Consulting Counseling with a God given purpose! 31
Health SURGE IN CASES Most individuals who are in the hospital and having complications with Covid are the unvaccinated. 56% of All Iowans are Fully Vaxxed 68% of All Asians Iowans are Fullly Vaxxed Source: coronavirus.iowa.gov, 11/23/21 40% of Black Iowans are Fully Vaxxed 37% of All Iowans are Fully Vaxxed
VAXDSM continues to advocate for communities of color to get vaccinated. It is now more important than ever as Covid is rising with a new variant Omicron in the city of Des Moines and that state of Iowa. Bobbretta Brewton and Jacquie Easley were on the Urban Impact show January 2nd sharing facts about Covid and the work that VAXDSM is continuing to do. Below is an update from VAXDSM on vaccinations, boosters, and data for vaccinations in communities of color. December 12th there was a vaccine clinic at Corinthian Baptist Church in collaboration with Jacquie Easley representing Mercy, Polk County health Department, and AmeriCorp Vista. There were approximately 200 people who came through and got vaccinated. The vision of VAXDSM is to do one to two clinics a month. VAXDSM will continue to carry out the message of getting vaccinated. While there is a surge in cases the data shows that most individuals who are in the hospital and having complications with Covid are the unvaccinated. Children ages 5-12 can now get vaccinated and boosters are being offered for children and adults. VAXDSM wants people to get vaccinated and take care of themselves. They continue to work with churches who are talking to members of their congregations to get vaccinated. VAXDSM also put on another clinic on January 9th this was for individuals who received their first shot on December 9th and individuals who were seeking a booster. Check out the latest guidelines from CDC to learn about quarantine and the requirements for vaccinated vs. vaccinated individuals COVID-19 Quarantine and Isolation | CDC Continue to check out VAXDSM website at https://www.unitedwaydm.org/vaxdsm as they are leading the charge to make sure you have the information and the opportunity to get vaccinated. 33
“ When Help knocks... ” When Help Knocks at Your Door…Open it! Written By: Cleophus (Cleo) Franklin Jr. “One must know not just how to accept a gift, but with what grace to share it.” — Maya Angelou There is a quote that I often rely on and remind myself throughout my personal, sports, and business life, and that is “no one is successful alone.” These powerful words resonate and represent a constant stark reminder that my achievements came to me via the guidance and encouragement of many caring individuals. My success is the result of the help from many… In short, for me to not acknowledge this truth is blasphemous and darn near criminal. Why? Because I know that without the kindness and consideration from others, the life I have lived would have been less fortunate, marked with even more strife, and short. Short enough with an expiration date that would have prevented me from writing this story. So my embrace of this perspective has helped me keep at bay any appearance of high-headedness and overconfidence. Especially during the times when others are heaping high praise upon you during those celebrated moments of accomplishment. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am a high achiever who appreciates the attention and recognition from accomplishments…but within these moments, I always remind myself of the support that has come my way to help me with my achievements. This brings me to the point of this story. You see, in life, sometimes help comes without your asking. It is like an unseen shadow that shapes events without your knowledge. Help can also appear as a subtle and powerful hidden force, an invisible hand. I liken it to a silent consigliere who operates behind the scenes. This person is never detected but is very effective. They move the chess pieces effortlessly on the board towards checkmate without signaling their intent. Help can also operate as a GPS navigation system, helping you get from point A to B. But in
this chapter, help moves like a silent partner that operates undetected, never revealing itself during the trip while you are driving. And when you get to your destination smiling, the difference is this GPS system helped you without your knowledge, while giving you the feeling that it was your mapping skills that got you there. I am a proud alumnus of the University of North Carolina - Kenan Flagler Graduate School of Business. I wear my UNC ring proudly not because of the esteem and reverence of graduating from a top MBA graduate school. I wear it to remind me that accomplishing this achievement was hard as hell. In fact, this would not have happened without the support of my wife Lois, and the finger that holds this cherished ring on my hand would be void of any adornment. During my UNC experience reflection session, I was assigned the task of creating a personal and professional development plan. The plan deep-dived my personality traits (through several personality test assessments), along with an evaluation of my personal strengths and weaknesses. It also included my career aspirations, goals, and objectives outlined in three to fiveyear increments, with my identified external and internal career derailers and obstacles. Lastly, the plan included my personal mitigation and self-management strategy to help me avoid any traps and unhealthy activities that would derail my career goal progress. Another key aspect of importance within my plan was a detailed outline of triggers that brought on a set of behaviors from my past in the workplace. These were behaviors that impacted my career negatively and impeded the development of my professional relationships and I identified a crucial area that needed to be addressed immediately! The area for development was my lack of patience. My plan identified a series of existing and potential problems this behavior caused when engaging my peers within the workplace. What would trigger this conduct with others is when I worked at a faster pace and others could not match it, This is when my impatience would trigger and manifest within my tone and manner. It rubbed people the wrong way and presented a big red flag for my career path ascension. This behavior often presented itself in my morning engagements and triggered a pattern of moodiness. I was made aware this behavior was highly visible and my colleagues were placed on high alert when engaging me. I heard the whispers circulating about me from my team as they would say, “Don’t go into his office early because you don’t know what you will get.” Well, from my point of view, the problem wasn’t me; it was them. I convinced myself that others didn’t get me and needed to match my energy and pace. But sadly, I was wrong. The problem was me. The cause of my edginess was coffee, which I did not need due to my highenergy nature. My coffee intake was akin to adding gasoline to a bonfire and my behavior kept the fire going! I wake up early daily, raring to go, but to my detriment…I got into the habit of consuming several cups of coffee, which overhyped my energy and lowered my tolerance. What made things worse, I worked in a culture that loved coffee! My coworkers would consume coffee before work, at work, and after…and I became a loyal coffee convert. However, the caffeine intake did not suit me at all. I could no longer ignore my “coffee problem” and I needed to take on this issue before it further ruined my career. So, in my development and behavior-changing plan, I decided I had four options: 1. I could share my plan with my wife, seek out her insights regarding my behavior as she knew me best (and surprisingly, she agreed with my peers). 2. Stop drinking coffee…full stop, which would be hard to do in a highly immersed coffee culture business environment. 3. Limit my coffee intake from three cups to two. Also, make sure that I would not consume any coffee after 9 AM. 4. And lastly, bring my coffee to work instead of buying it, as this would ensure I would not only control my intake, and what I would bring from home would not exceed more than two cups. 35
“One must know not just how to accept a gift, but with what grace to share it.” - Maya Angelou Well, here is where I landed, as my strategy included options two, three, and four. I also asked my wife for help in this important endeavor. Lois agreed to make me no more than two cups of coffee each morning, and she would also monitor (and provide feedback on) my behavior at home which she made me aware of. I also asked a few close colleagues at work to watch and see if they noticed a change in my morning engagement with others during the upcoming weeks. It was important for me to track my progress towards becoming the person others looked forward to seeing in the morning versus someone they hid from! The result: After three months of decreased coffee consumption, my team noticed a significant change in my morning disposition. I saw it too! I felt a lot better and was much calmer in my interactions with my team, colleagues, and peers. Also, when our exchanges became spirited, I was the one who interacted with everyone with the serene spirit of a buddha. Yes, the new Franklin was the person they looked for to quiet the storm, sought advice from and quizzed about how they too could bring a more balanced approach to their lives. Wow! That was my reaction and what a boost to my ego. I wallowed in confidence and embraced a feeling of increased assuredness from the plan development, implementation, and execution for my positive personal transformation. I was on top of the world, and as my parent’s generation would say, I was not only feeling myself and brimming over with confidence, I was also smelling myself! Which is a good segway and transition point to bring you to the “rest of the story!” It happened over coffee with my wife Lois one Saturday morning. I was saturating her unmercifully with my glory and self-gratified metamorphosis at the office. I prattled on about the renewed reception of the new and improved Franklin and how my plan of execution down this path of reverence was successful. As I went on about how my heroic acts of conquering my caffeine and coffee demons were superb, I noticed a subtle bit of indifference in her body language during this discussion. This was like a moment when a keynote speaker suspects they are losing their audience during a key point in a presentation. Call it a mood change or a shift in the wind, regardless…these are sobering moments that instinctively set off alarm bells for experienced presenters. When this happens, they know it’s time to pause, gauge your audience, and audit your suspicions by proceeding with the signature move of, “Are there any questions thus far before we get into the next section?” As I nervously watched Lois lower her coffee cup from her lips and, with her signature half-grin and raised eyebrow, I asked her, “Lois, what’s up? Is there something you need to tell me? My wife looked at me with a face my children and I have seen before and know well. It is a face that telegraphs empathy from a courtroom judge who is just about to deliver to the accused a hard sentence - laden with the look of, “here comes the truth, but I am not sure you can handle the truth!” She responded to me with the delivery of a well-trained inquisitor, “So, you do know there was some help in your behavior transformation plan you may not be aware of Mr. Franklin?” I replied with a look of astonishment at first, followed by another look of suspicion, as I thought to myself, “Why is she challenging my story of
excellence? So I replied, “What do you mean, Lois? You told me yourself months ago that I was managing my caffeine intake well, and because of this, it no longer affected me. Hey, I control myself because I know how to manage and handle my business. I don’t see why it is so hard for you to just give me the credit I deserved!” Lois smiled gently and replied, “Cleo, the reason why you handled your business and were able to manage your caffeine is that the coffee you have been drinking over the past three months and the cup you are bragging over now is also decaffeinated! Honey, I changed your coffee without you knowing it! I saw what caffeine was doing to you, and I wanted to help you, and I did. Yes, you are doing so much better, and I love the changes I see in the new you. But, I need to tell you it is because you are drinking decaf coffee. By the way, it agrees with you, and I love you enough that I saw you needed more help than what you asked for and I provided it to you unsolicited!” I thought, “What the heck!” The nerve of this woman tricking me into believing that I was the one making and calling the shots... as my six foot three inches frame (and oversized head) made the sound of a balloon deflating when the air slowly seeped out. Her reveal hurt a bit and reminded me of the story, “The Jungle Book.” However, in this story, I was no longer the hero man-child ”Mowgli, the “Man-Cub who possessed the “flower of fire” that neutralized the powerful and deadly antagonist Shere-Khan. I was stripped from the self-appointed title of “Man-Cub, and was whittled down to the name of just…“Cub!” How dare she do this to me and practice her Harry Potter “Dark Arts” magic and deception without my knowledge and consent. But I confess. The woman was right, and damn was she clever. A quote comes to mind that describes this moment and one that well-represented my face as my jaw dropped to the floor when I heard my wife tell me this hardcore truth. “Leadership is about making others better as a result of your presence and making sure that impact lasts in your absence!” It was my wife Lois who demonstrated authentic leadership, as she not only made me better with her presence, it lasted in her absence. 37
“ ...open it! ” Stevie Nicks, a Rock legend, says, “Don’t be a lady…be a legend.” And in my eyes, what my wife did was legendary. She knew that on my path to change a career-threatening behavior, what I did not realize was that I needed not only her help… but even more than I realized. I lucked on in this story, and my lucky charm is called “Lois.” The point is even when we need help sometimes, we are too proud or afraid to ask, neglect to ask, hesitate to take it, and sometimes go it alone. Unfortunately, this is a recipe fraught with seeds of self-inflicted disaster. As a successful and self-aware leader, I realized to achieve success, one must actively and consciously seek others who can help you. And if you are lucky, others will help you without your knowledge, which is called “favor,” and that, my friends, is something worth more than its weight in gold. My mother would often pray that we would have favor from God and men, and I see why, because it is this type of favor - big or small, that changes lives, drives transformation, and prevents ourselves from self-inflicted pain and injury. Lois, the legend, may you continue to help those in need, and may you have favor from God and man! #seekouthelp & #bethankfulforit
G We d CONTACT US TODAY! 515-770-2271 •
Angela Jackson’s Bio Debra Carr Bio Angela Jackson, Esq. is an Entrepreneur and owner of The Great Frame Up which is an Art Gallery and Custom Framing Business located in West Des Moines. She also is Senior Vice President of Diversity, Equity and Inclusion at Athene USA Corporation. Angela serves her community as Board Member of The West Des Moines Chamber, Des Moines Arts Festival, Cornerstone Family Church and an Honorary Board Member for Des Moines Performing Arts. She is a member of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc. and The Des Moines Chapter of the Links, Incorporated. Angela is a Thought Leader and alumni of Washington University School of Law and Duke University. Debra Carr serves professionally and personally as a champion for diversity, inclusion, and equity. Uplifting women and girls to become the best version of themselves is foundational. Debra is Principal Consultant and owner of Carr and Associates and works full-time for Des Moines Public Schools consulting for building level administrators, faculty, and staff to achieve school improvement goals. Debra has received numerous awards and is a champion for her community in which she has served for many years. Gary Lawson’s Bio Gary Lawson is a freelance writer who focuses on various aspects of business and government. He earned a graduate degree in Government Administration, and an undergraduate degree in Business Administration with a duel concentration in Management and Marketing. He is a VietnamEra veteran who has served as a Commissioned Officer in the United States Army. In addition, he has taught business courses at Drake University and Des Moines Area Community College. C O NTRIB UT O RS Celeste Lawson’s bio Celeste Lawson is a freelance writer who focuses on various aspects of education and cultural diversity. She earned a graduate degree in Curriculum and Instruction, and an undergraduate degree in Elementary Education, with concentrations in English and Language Arts. In addition, she has more than 20 years of classroom experience with teaching students at the primary, secondary, and post-secondary levels.
Caleb Thomas Bio Bert Moody Bio For over ten years Caleb has worked in the field of counseling with youth and their families, as a school counselor, behavioral health intervention services counselor, and a mental health counselor. Today Caleb has his own Mental Health private practice, Thomas & Associates Counseling & Consulting which is located in Iowa City, Iowa. His practice focuses on the spiritual, mental, physical, and emotional well-being of each individual client. Caleb works with children, youth, adults, couples and families helping them solve tough problems with a Christ-centered, solution-focused approach. His desire is to bring about a positive change to the various challenges life can bring. Caleb is an Ordained and Licensed Minister and Elder and volunteers his time as a Ministry Director for Lifepointe Christian Faith Center. Bert Moody is a Photographer, an IT Consultant, and Web Designer for the Urban Experience Magazine. He has been with the magazine from its inception. He has been a Freelance Photographer in the Des Moines area since 1985, first with Esquire Photo Agency and now with Imagez Photo Studio (www. imagezphotostudio.com). He also is a longtime associate at Nationwide Insurance as is a part of their National Network of Black Associates. Bert volunteers for many activities in the community and is a Board member with The Des Moines Urban Experience. Bert is married with three grown children. C O NTRIB UT O RS Donetta Austin Donnetta Austin is from the Midwest. Her accomplishments include graduating from Scott Eastern Iowa Community College as a Registered & Certified Dental Assistant. She has worked in healthcare for seventeen years. She also provides care for elderly as a certified nurse aide and currently attending DMACC as a Nursing student. Donnetta became an author of her book “Never Retire God” in 2017. This book can be purchased on Amazon. She enjoys writing inspirational books and articles. She feels this is apart of her life’s purpose. Her writing expresses the importance of living a life with no regrets, uplifting others, and making a significant impact by sharing her testimony. It is her life’s goal to make a difference in the lives of others. 41 Lori A. Young Bio Lori A. Young is a native of Des Moines and a graduate of Tech High School and Grand View University. Her professional experience lies in corporate internal and marketing communications. Currently she is self-employed on assignment with the non-profit organization, Just Voices Iowa, as a Communications Director and Project Manager. In her spare time, she’s a feature writer, artist, and community organizer/social activist fighting on issues such as racial, environmental, and economic justice for over 10 years.
Cleophus “Cleo” Franklin Jr.’s Bio Cleophus “Cleo” Franklin Jr.’s leadership expertise is globally recognized. His passion for designing robust business growth, brand strategies, and implementing innovative, disruptive business models have benefited many global businesses and industries. Franklin’s values and beliefs are centered on approaching difficult challenges with curiosity and a beginner’s mindset. He is a purpose-driven leader who embraces servant leadership and investing in the personal and professional development of the next generation of leaders. His leadership career spans over thirty years with John Deere, Case-New Holland, and Mahindra as a global executive. Franklin is a published author. His global leadership book Coffee with Cleo (coffeewithcleo.com) was launched in June 2020. His book highlights ten leadership lessons from his global business executive career. Through artful and engaging storytelling, it showcases how one can navigate challenges successfully in our ever-changing, fastpaced, and complex business world by using an innovative entrepreneurship mindset and proven framework to improve your livelihood, but more importantly, your life. Courageous Bio Negus Sankofa Imhotep’s Bio Courageous exited a 13-year intimate partner relationship because she discovered it was steeped in multiple abuses, including psychological, sexual, and spiritual. This experience made her not only want to learn how and why it happened to her, but how she and other Black sisters could avoid it in the future. Her gift of converting personal life experiences into educational currency is well proven; however, this time she believes it has led her to develop what may be the most important work in her 9 years of curriculum design and delivery - Empowerment through the Arts™. Black trauma-informed therapists recommend it and Black female focus group participants are finding the program’s gains to be sustainable. Courageous has begun the work in the community that interacts with the Black female survivor as well, bringing tools that allow them to see the Black female victimsurvivor’s needs and address them appropriately in her Awareness Education, Survivor Empowerment, and Community Support Training. She is thrilled to bring the work of Courageous Fire, LLC to the pages of the Urban Experience Magazine to keep growing the numbers of Black sisters that get the help they need. Stay Connected to Courageous: Website, Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube, Twitter C O NTRIB UT O RS Negus Sankofa Imhotep is the Academic & Workforce Coordinator at Urban Dreams and the Deferred Expulsion Case Manager for Des Moines Public Schools. In these roles, he has connected several of Central Iowa’s top employers with highly skilled untapped talent, assisted hundreds of marginalized central Iowans in securing gainful employment, and successfully advocated on behalf of more than 50 students who faced expulsion from the Des Moines Public School district. Negus is also a sought-after orator and community ally, having served as an Executive Board Member for the Iowa Human Rights Board, a past Chair and Commissioner of the Iowa Commission on the Status of African Americans. In 2015, Negus launched Rudison Consultancy Group, LLC to offer cultural community network advising and cultural competency training to agencies and organizations across the region. His commitment to educating emerging leaders is what led him to teaching positions at Hawkeye Community College and Joshua Christian Academy in 2013. Negus holds a Bachelor’s degree in Liberal Arts with a concentration in Political Science from Excelsior College, a Master’s degree in Public Administration from Norwich University, and is currently writing his dissertation for a Doctorate in Business Administration with a concentration in Human Resource Management from Northcentral University.
It's important to take the time to acknowledge the uniqueness of the deceased: the individuality of their personality, and the uniqueness of their life's path. Not just for them, but for you; it affirms the relationship, and leads to healing after loss. Honoring their life is truly an act of love – for the both of you. “WE’RE FAMILY” PHONE: (515) 309-6550 3500 SIXTH AVENUE DES MOINES, IA 50313 HENDERSONSHP.COM 43
• Exceptional prenatal, delivery, and postpartum care • Beautiful maternity suites • Exceptional birthing staff • Secure newborn nursery • Pregnancy & postpartum groups and classes • Lactation and breastfeeding consultation and support (515) 282-2340 1801 Hickman Road, Des Moines, IA www.broadlawns.org
1 Publizr