1
WRITERS & STAFF Editor-In-Chief Dwana Bradley Contributors Copy Editor Virgina Smith Creative Director Ash Easley Donnetta Austin Debra Carr Terence Haynes Angela Jackson Celeste Lawson Gary Lawson Bert Moody Lori Young Marcus Supreme MAGAZINE OUTLETS Broadlawns 1801 Hickman Road, Des Moines, IA 50314 CareMore 1530 East Euclid, Des Moines, Iowa 50313 Central Library 1000 Grand Ave, Des Moines, IA 50309 DMACC Urban Campus 1100 7th Street, Des Moines, IA 50314 DSM Brew Coffee Co. 300 Martin Luther King Jr. Pkwy, Suite 140, Des Moines, Iowa 50309 Drake Diner 1111 25th Street, Des Moines, IA 50311 Eastside Library 2559 Hubbell Ave. Des Moines, Iowa 50317 Evelyn Davis Center 801 Suite #3, University Ave, Des Moines IA 50314 Fields Pharmacy 501 University Ave. Des Moines, IA 50314 Iowa-Nebraska NAACP 1620 Pleseant Suite #210, Des Moines, IA 50314 Forest Library 1326 Forest Ave, Des Moines, IA 50314 Franklin Library 5000 Franklin Ave. Des Moines, Iowa 50310 Hy-Vee 3330 Martin Luther King Jr. Pkwy, Des Moines, IA 50310 John R. Grubb YMCA 11th Street, Des Moines, Iowa 50314 Johnston Library 6700 Merle Hay Rd. Johnston, Iowa 50131 Northside Library 3516 5th Ave. Des Moines, Iowa 50313 Mr. Bibbs 2705 6th Ave, Des Moines, IA 50313 Senior Polk County 2008 Forest Ave, Des Moines IA 50314 Smokey Row Coffee Co. 1910 Cottage Grove, Des Moines, Iowa 50314 Southside Library 1111 Porter Ave. Des Moines, Iowa 50315 The Great Frame Up 5515 Mills Civic Parkway Suite #150, West Des Moines, IA 50266 COVID-19 The Des Moines Civil and Human Rights 602 Robert D. Ray Drive, Des Moines IA 50309 The Urban Dreams 601 Forest Avenue, Des Moines, Iowa 50314 Traditions Grooming Parlor 1111 E. Army Post Road Ste. 154 Urbandale Public Library 3520 86th Street, Urbandale, IA 50322 Urbandale Chamber of Commerce 2830 100th Street, Suite 110, Urbandale, IA 50322 West Des Moines Library 4000 Mills Clive Pkwy, West Des Moines, Iowa 50365 The Zone of Comfort 3829 71st Street, Suite B,
SUMMARY 6 Featured Artist of the Month 12 14 28 16 32 3 House approves bill to make Juneteenth a federal holiday 16 Freedom’s Story Save the Date 24 While We Wait to Breathe Again: Part 1 Dress for Success 21 43 Black Owned Business in Iowa 32 Perspectives on Fatherhood 30 We Are Still Here Health 28 Join our email club at: joindsmurban@gmail.com Submit your news to: dsmurbannews@gmail.com Become a Outlet for Urban: contactdsmurban@gmail.com
EDITORIAL HAPPY FATHER’S DAY Dwana Bradley Editor in Chief F ather’s Day is a day that can be bittersweet especially if your father is no longer living or you don’t have the best or any relationship with your father. I want to wish all father’s a happy day. I pray that you can enjoy it and you are surrounded by love, peace, and happiness. I want to take a moment to say a few words about my father Roderick Bradley. He is a man who wears many hats from Pastor, brother, cousin, husband, grandpa, friend, but I know him as dad. The man who has never let me down and has always pushed me to be my best. My dad never left me when I didn’t make the best decisions, instead he would pray for me and encourage me along the way. I’ve been told I’m like my dad and I’d have to agree. My hard headedness, my strength, my determination, my love of people, my faith, and my talk all stems from my father. He has raised me to stay close to Jesus, say sorry when I mess up, and put my all into everything I do. I love my father and I thank God that he placed us in each other’s lives. Dad, I pray you have a wonderful Father’s Day and know I love you! 5
THE GREAT FRAME UP SUPPORTS AFRICAN AMERICAN ARTIST JUNE FEATURE: RONNIE PHILLIPS DES MOINES, IOWA – We enjoy supporting the local art community by offering area artists an opportunity to display their art on a monthly rotating schedule. We consistently support African American artists and feature their original artwork, prints and mixed media on paper. This month we introduce readers to an award winning African American artist Ronnie Phillips.
Artist, photographer and educator, Ronnie Phillips, was born and raised in Los Angeles, California. He served as an educator and editorial photographer in Los Angeles and Hollywood for over 17 years and was a photographer for the Los Angeles Olympic Committee. He taught photography for six years with the Los Angeles Unified School District. As an editorial photographer, he photographed celebrities ranging from Redd Fox to Tony Bennet. His photographs have been published in numerous publications and was a west coast photographer for Johnson Publication for eleven years. Ronnie Phillips became a full-time artist in 1991. He participates in over 20 shows a year on the fine art festival circuit and has won over 100 awards and seven Best of Show. Ronnie Phillips is recognized for his hauntingly beautiful sepia toned, hand oiled photographs of children. These photos have been featured on many network sitcoms and renowned television shows. He has also published work in magazine such as TV Guide, Essence and Ebony. Now giving credence to a more creative side and nurturing a different creative spirit, he has merged into Mixed Media. Now Ronnie Phillips adheres his photos on to canvas, then paints a scene around the image with acrylic paint. Ronnie Phillips says, “Art is an important experience. As photographer, I have the eye for capturing the essence of an image. My goal is that the viewer may be drawn to reflect on their own life experience and ideologies. Art should make one smile, think and reflect.” “I aspire to assist others to deepen their process of self-reflection through my work.” - Ronnie Phillips
Credits - www.ronphillipsart.com/ We currently feature originals, prints, sculptures and framed artwork of numerous African American and Iowa artists in the gallery. To see some of the prior artists featured visit westdesmoines.thegreatframeup.com and our Facebook page at facebook.com/tgfuwdmiowa. Please follow us on Instagram instagram.com/thegreatframeup_wdm Pinterest pinterest. com/tgfuwdm and Twitter @tgfuwdm. An award winning artist, Ronnie Phillips’ prints are currently available at The Great Frame Up. About The Great Frame Up Founded in 1972, The Great Frame Up, Inc. is a custom picture framer, offering more than 1,000 custom frame mouldings and mat styles, ready to hang framed art and local artwork. The Great Frame Up is located at 5515 Mills Civic Parkway in the West Glen Town Center in West Des Moines and is open Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday 10- 6pm; Thursday 10- 8pm & Saturday 10 - 5pm. Members receive a adult 20% discount JOIN TODAY! summer classes IN PERSON AND VIRTUAL OPTIONS FOR MORE INFORMATION VISIT desmoinesartcenter.org/LEARN
IOWA JUNETEENTH OBSERVANCE IT'S A FAMILY AFFAIR - SATURDAY JUNE 19TH, 2021 WESTERN GATEWAY PARK - 11A.M. - 11 P.M. IOWA JUNETEENTH 2021 NEIGHBOR'S DAY NEIGHBOR'S D Thank you to Our Sponsors for an Amazing Iowa Juneteenth Observance 2021
June 2021 TUESDAY 1 TUESDAY 1 WEDNESDAY 2 THURSDAY 3 FRIDAY 4 3:30PM - 5:30PM *OPEN STUDIO!* SATURDAY 5 6:30PM - 8PM $27 TUESDAY!!! SATURDAY 5 WINE GLASS PAINTING! 6:30PM - 8:30PM SUNDAY 6 6:30PM - 8:30PM LADIES NIGHT OUT! MONDAY 7 GET SOCIAL FRIDAY NIGHT! 7PM - 9PM WEDNESDAY 9 FAMILY & FRIENDS PAINTING 12PM - 1:30PM COUPLES & BESTIES NIGHT! 7PM - 9PM THURSDAY 10 FRIDAY 11 WEEKEND "WINE" DOWN! 12PM - 2PM SATURDAY 12 PURPLE CELEBRATION! 6PM - 8PM SATURDAY 12 PAINT YOUR PET PARTY! 6PM - 8:30PM SUNDAY 13 6:30PM - 8:30PM BLACK LIGHT NIGHT! 7PM - 9PM SUNDAY 13 MONDAY 14 3PM - 5PM WEDNESDAY 16 COUPLES & BESTIES NIGHT! 7PM - 9PM THURSDAY 17 ZEN PAINTING EVENT 12PM - 2PM FRIDAY 18 WEEKEND "WINE" DOWN! 3PM - 5PM KIDS CAMP WEEK 9AM - 12PM SATURDAY 19 SATURDAY 19 PORCH LEANER PAINTING! 6:30PM - 8:30PM SUNDAY 20 6:30PM - 8:30PM WEDNESDAY 23 GET SOCIAL FRIDAY NIGHT! 7PM - 9PM THURSDAY 24 FAMILY & FRIENDS PAINTING 12PM - 1:30PM COUPLES & BESTIES NIGHT! 7PM - 9PM FRIDAY 25 SATURDAY 26 WEEKEND "WINE" DOWN! 2PM - 4PM SATURDAY 26 6:30PM - 8:30PM LADIES NIGHT OUT! SUNDAY 27 6:30PM - 8:30PM SUNDAY 27 COUPLES & BESTIES NIGHT! 7PM - 9PM MOMMY/DADDY & ME! 12PM - 1:30PM © 2021 Painting with a Twist BLACK LIGHT NIGHT! 7PM - 9PM 12PM - 2PM All paintings subject to change. Find our most current calendar online at paintingwithatwist.com/des-moines/ WEEKEND "WINE" DOWN! 3PM - 5PM Independently owned and operated
House approves bill to make Juneteenth a federal holiday by: The Associated Press Posted: Jun 16, 2021 / 07:40 PM EDT / Updated: Jun 16, 2021 / 07:42 PM EDT WASHINGTON (AP) – The United States will soon have a new federal holiday commemorating the end of slavery in the nation. The House voted 415-14 Wednesday to make Juneteenth, or June 19th, the 12th federal holiday. The bill now goes to President Joe Biden’s desk to be signed into law. Juneteenth commemorates when the last enslaved African Americans learned they were free. Confederate soldiers surrendered in April 1865, but word didn’t reach the last enslaved Black people until June 19, when Union soldiers brought the news of freedom to Galveston, Texas. That was also about two and a half years after the Emancipation Proclamation freeing slaves in the Southern states. It’s the first new federal holiday since Martin Luther King Jr. Day was created in 1983. “Our federal holidays are purposely few in number and recognize the most important milestones,” said Rep. Carolyn Maloney, D-NY. “I cannot think of a more important milestone to commemorate than the end of slavery in the United. States.” Sheila Jackson Lee, D-Texas, speaking next to a large poster of a Black man whose back bore massive scarring from being (ADVERTISING) whipped, said she would be in Galveston this Saturday to celebrate along with Republican Sen. John Cornyn of Texas. “Can you imagine?” said the rather short Jackson Lee. “I will be standing maybe taller than Senator Cornyn, forgive me for that, because it will be such an elevation of joy.” The Senate passed the bill a day earlier under a unanimous consent agreement that expedites the process for considering legislation. It takes just one senator’s objection to block such agreements. “Please, let us do as the Senate. Vote unanimously for passage,” Rep. David Scott, D-Ga., “Our federal holidays are purposely few in number and recognize the most important milestones,” said Rep. Carolyn Maloney, D-NY. “I cannot think of a more important milestone to commemorate than the end of slavery in the United. States.”
FILE – In this June 19, 2020, file photo, people demonstrate in Chicago, to mark Juneteenth. A national coalition of labor unions, along with racial and social justice organizations, will stage a mass walkout from work July 20, as part of an ongoing reckoning on systemic racism and police brutality in the U.S. (AP Photo/Nam Y. Huh, File) pleaded at one point with his colleagues. The bill was sponsored by Sen. Edward Markey, D-Mass., and had 60 co-sponsors. Democratic leaders moved quickly to bring the bill to the House floor. Some Republican lawmakers opposed the effort. Rep. Matt Rosendale, R-Mont., said creating the federal holiday was an effort to celebrate “identity politics.” “Since I believe in treating everyone equally, regardless of race, and that we should be focused on what unites us rather than our differences, I will vote no,” he said in a press release. The vast majority of states recognize Juneteenth as a holiday or have an official observance of the day, and most states hold celebrations. Juneteenth is a paid holiday for state employees in Texas, New York, Virginia and Washington. (ADVERTISING) Under the legislation, the federal holiday would be known as Juneteenth National Independence Day. Rep. Clay Higgins, R-La., said he would vote for the bill and he supported the establishment of a federal holiday, but he was upset that the name of the holiday included the word independence rather than emancipation. “Why would the Democrats want to politicize this by coopting the name of our sacred holiday of Independence Day?” Higgins said. “I want to say to my white colleagues on the other side, getting your independence from being enslaved in a country is different from a country getting independence to rule themselves,” Rep. Brenda Lawrence, D-Mich., replied, adding, “We have a responsibility to teach every generation of Black and white Americans the pride of a people who have survived, endured and succeeded in these United States of America despite slavery.” 13
SPIRITUALITY For I know the plans I have for you, “declares the Lord”, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11 For entering into a new season In honor of celebrating you! Say hello to the new things that lie ahead of you and goodbye to the old. Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, “declares the Lord”, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Engage in the process of change with an expected end of hopefulness. God said “I AM” John 14:6 Jesus saith unto him; I am the way, the truth; and the life: no man cometh unto the father, but by me.
God is whatever you need him to be during this season in your life. Never hesitate to call upon a friend we have in Jesus. He is our rock, our source, He controls the outcome. Let loose of the weight. There is fruit being developed in the middle of the disruption, chaos, or frustration. The delay is definitely going to be worth it. You have a responsibility trust in Him. This is an opportunity to get into preparation and exchange the gift of becoming a blessing. God will give you the ability to do it in spite of what you’re up against. We flourish through our experiences, and you lack in nothing. You have the whole armor of God. Author Donnetta Austin, Amazon “Never Retire God”, Email be.encouragedbyone@ gmail.com NFC House Party Finding and Funding Your Dream Home Thursday, June 17, 6 PM REGISTRATION REQUIRED: DMPL.ORG/EVENTS Whether you’re just starting to think about purchasing your own home or getting ready to make repairs, our panel of experts can help you find your way! Neighborhood Finance Corporation provides home purchase, refinance and home improvement loans paired with forgivable loans for home renovation, and down payment assistance for eligible home buyers. Join us to ask questions from people who know the process inside and out. If you are not able to attend, our experts are available at 515-246-0010 or NeighborhoodFinance.org. dmpl.org | 515.283.4152 NMLS #8943
COURAGEOUS TRUTHS: Freedom’s Story A 36-year-old, shapely Black Beautiful named Freedom*1 was just finishing getting little Li-Li (short for Aaliyah) ready for daycare. Li-Li was such a loving, mild-mannered little girl, that Freedom often found herself going in slow motion just to spend more time with her; today was no exception. She was cuttin’ it close in avoiding the fee for late drop off, but made sure to kiss Xavier, her husband, sweetly tell him how much she loved him, and wish him a good day.
Xavier had been to Freedom exactly what his name’s meaning implied - a saviour. When she met him, she had just lost her car, was close to losing her job, and eviction was looming. Although only knowing her a short while, Xavier said he felt moved to help her. He loaned her his car, which immediately straightened out her work situation, and paid to catch up her back rent. With the debt monkeys off her back she could see her way clear to get her life stabilized, and thanks to him, she did. As their friendship sped ahead, Freedom found herself feeling strangely safe with Xavier much more quickly than she could remember with anyone else before him. The next thing she knew, he was asking for her hand in marriage, and she gleefully accepted. Sometime after the engagement, a few things seemed to slow down with Xavier. Instead of him taking Freedom on dates, he began allowing her to pay. He told her to keep his car and just pick him up when he asked, and he didn’t seem to be taking nearly as many freelance construction jobs as before. Freedom thought this was odd, but Xavier was so attentive on the phone and in person, and of course, there was also all the help he gave her in the early days of their friendship. JoinOneLove.org article: What Emotional Abuse Really Means Freedom figured things would smooth out at some point, returning to the way she was accustomed to s seeing him handle his everyday life. Fast forward, and they were married. Although Freedom had fantasized about a beautiful, storybook wedding, Xavier said he didn’t see the reason to spend so much money on a one-day event. This was only the beginning of the compromises with which she would be expected to comply. Two children and three years later, Freedom bore no resemblance to her own name. Xavier had stopped working entirely, he never helped with child rearing unless to nullify one of her standards with them. He stopped sharing household duties also and made a “family project” whenever possible out of any work that was set aside as his contribution to the household. In the beginning stages of their friendship, he was so easy to talk to; it seemed like they never disagreed. Now, anytime Freedom attempted to discuss his new and uncooperative behavior with him, he had this pattern2 of telling her it wasn’t like she said it was, getting quickly worked up to the point that he insisted he needed sexual gratification to calm him down, accusing her of having a malicious motivation for starting the conversation, 1 Freedom* is a fictitious, composite character, as well as the o ther characters in this story. Freedom is used to demonstrate the factual material contained within this article. The characters’ attributes/demographics are taken from case studies, surveys, and DV abuse definitions. 2 17 and blocking the door if she tried to walk away from the conversation while yelling for her to choose whether she wanted him or the point she was making. Not only did Freedom find it difficult to locate any semblance of the man with whom she previously shared a friendship, she was questioning herself as well. Freedom used to be a woman who felt she had much to offer in relationships and in the professional realm. She realized she was now known for stalling out in decision-making and noticeably not present during conversations at work. She had lost her motivation to exercise regularly, and it was definitely showing; she had picked up 5-10 pounds like clockwork every year. She was normally an even-tempered woman much like Li-Li, but now she had become aware of feeling anxious in unfamiliar situations to the point that she would verbally and socially shut down. She would find herself fighting sadness that seemingly had no cause these days and caught herself daydreaming about self-harm during some of his more v vicious moments.
However, much like our ancestors in Galveston, Texas in 1865, she met her General Granger. She realized right then She was at work one day in a mandatory training brought by a loving Black woman who started talking about how she was delivered from domestic violence. Freedom immediately felt badly for this woman, because she knew she never wanted to experience the feeling of being harmed by the man she loved. She listened intently as the woman talked about “finding out she was being abused”. That confused Freedom. How could anyone not know they were being beaten up? As she listened she heard the description of emotional abuse : “ any abusive behavior that isn’t physical , which may include verbal aggression, intimidation, manipulation, and humiliation, which most often unfolds as a pattern of behavior over time that aims t o diminish another person’s sense of identity, dignity and self worth , and which often results instead of anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts or behaviors, and posttraumatic stress disorder ( PTSD).” 3 Several articles: (a), ( b), (c), (d) 4 Juneteenth.com article: History of Juneteenth 6 Des Moines area for mental h health within the Black community. 8 5 Emotional Abuse definition taken from JoinOneLove.org article: What Emotional Abuse Really Means National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24/7 through the website or phone: 800-799-7233. Breanne Ward, LMHC , is a Black female trauma-informed t therapist & owner/founder of Forward Consulting, LLC , which continues to be a trailblazer in the greater WomensLaw.org has a section that encourages DV victims/survivors to “ know the law ”. By clicking here, one can find out the laws and resources for legal help in their state. This is the best place this author has found to u understand your specific type(s) of abuse you are enduring and get help making an effective safety plan. 7 19 that she, Freedom, was in a relationship where she was being emotionally abused. The speaker told the audience that if they called the National Domestic Violence Hotline a trained phone advocate would help them formulate an individualized safety plan . (PHOTO) Freedom realized the way she was being treated and the way it made her feel was real. She knew this was her chance to learn more, and she took it. Every day at work, she found time to talk with the speaker whose business card she still had. She finally felt seen, heard, and understood during their conversations, and she always got more information than she came in with. The woman explained to her that there were Black female trauma-informed therapists in her area and got her connected to a wonderful woman named Breanne . Today, Freedom is experiencing higher and higher levels of exactly that - FREEDOM. She is no longer married to her former saviour; she finds her own salvation by empowering herself. Although, he tried to get custody of the children he never wanted to care for during the marriage, through WomensLaw.org information on Iowa law she has been able to , maintain custody of her girls. She read that ⅓ of women reporting abuse re-enter with another partner in the same year of their freedom . She doesn’t want her or her girls to experience the setback of new abuse, so she’s got plans to participate in Empowerment through the Arts™10 . I’m sharing Freedom’s story during the month of Juneteenth to help you embrace or support freedom in the following ways: 1. In a relationship? Make sure it’s healthy: The Hotline.org, Phone: 800-799-7233 2. In an abusive relationship? Talk to The Hotline.org to commence safety planning. 3. Survivor and stable in your new life? Sign up for Empowerment through the Arts™; avoid future DV cycles: Future DV Prevention 4. Community member? Support others on their way to Freedom : Awareness Education; Community Support Education 5. Want to financially support the work? Donate Here Blessings. #Permission By Courageous Fire DV Advocate & Founder of Courageous Fire, LLC
I know what you are thinking, another goal setting article. There is a reason you see so many people writing about this subject. Goal setting can take your life and career to the next level. Harvey MacKay stated, “A dream is just a dream. A goal is a dream with a plan and a deadline”. Setting goals helps take the focus off short-term gain and directs your mind to impactful long-term results. There are many different types of goals to set and reasons for doing so. Some people may want to take their career to the next level. Others may have goals to get themselves out of debt or save for a big project. Others may want to get healthier and start eating healthier or start a workout program. Whatever your goal is, I hope you learn something that can help you succeed. Tips for success: 1) Be inspired One of the biggest factors determining your success is having a plan and doing it for yourself. If you are trying to please someone else, you will lose your motivation. Pick a goal that you know will benefit your life and that you are inspired to reach. Motivation leaves quickly, so you will eventually need to rely on self-discipline. 2) Set S.M.A.R.T. goals I am sure most of you have heard of SMART goals. S stands for specific, M for measurable, A for attainable, R for relevant, T for time-bound. Being specific helps your goals not become too vague or overwhelming. Measurable helps you determine if you have reached your goal. Goals that are attainable help you stay motivated and your confidence levels high. Relevant goals ensure that they will have a positive impact on your life and that you are not wasting your valuable time. When your goals only in your mind, they feel more like a dream. Dreams are not reality. When you put together a SMART goal and put it down on paper, it is an actual plan. Better than just writing the goals down, create a vision board. Visualization is a powerful tool that works like the law of attraction. When you see pictures of your goals every day, you remember why you started. Vision boards help keep you focused on where you want to be and how you will feel when you get there. I can tell you from personal experience – vision boards have kept me focused on my goals long after my motivation left. 4) Set milestones on your journey Big goals can be overwhelming and often seem a little out of reach. In fact, I would say that if your goals are not a little out of reach, they are not big enough. One way to keep your spirits up and motivation levels high is to celebrate your work! Goal setting is hard and setting smaller goals along the way will help you keep motivated. If you want to try and run a marathon, I would not wait until you reach the full 26 miles to celebrate! Do something special to celebrate your success when you reach the 5k and 10k distance as well. 5) Be positive Goal setting can be a mentally draining and daunting task. Be sure to do whatever it is that keeps you motivated and happy along the way. In fact, telling other people or working on goals with others is beneficial. You can have your own personal cheerleading squad to keep you going when you are feeling down. If taking a daily walk everyday helps you stay happy and focused, do that. If exercising helps you feel better, do that. Hobbies and activities outside of your goal will help keep your motivation tank full. 21
National HIV Testing Day June 27th Get tested for HIV to know your status regardless of whether you believe you are at risk. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recommend that everyone between the ages of 13 and 64 get tested for HIV at least once. TAKE CHARGE OF YOUR HEALTH. GET AN HIV TEST TODAY. Learn more at StopHIVIowa.org See What Urban Can Do for You!
Inspired by a great leader, Bright College is taking a new approach to education. ationwide is on your side. Want to do school differently? So do we. Our two-year associate degrees are designed to accelerate your career. drake.edu/bright Embracing a culture for all Nationwide is a proud sponsor of the Iowa Juneteenth Observance. An inclusive workforce is crucial to our success, which is why we are committed to attracting, developing and retaining unique, talented and diverse associates. We are proud of our inclusive culture that supports every associate’s success and encourages an environment where they can feel challenged, appreciated, respected and engaged. See how Nationwide values diversity, equity and inclusion at nationwide.com/diversity. Nationwide, the Nationwide N and Eagle and Nationwide is on your side are service marks of Nationwide Mutual Insurance Company. © 2021 Nationwide CPR-1155AO (05/21) 23
“ WHILE WE WAIT TO BREATHE AGAIN ” Part 1: INHALE “Don’t do this to me again, Sheila.” Miles pleaded to his girlfriend, as he watched her trying to leave him again for what seemed like the hundredth time. Sheila stood, facing him with a tear-soaked face full of exasperation. “Why? What difference does it make if I leave now? Huh? I’m going to have to leave you eventually. Why wait it out? Just rip the band-aid off now and save yourself unnecessary pain.” Miles didn’t understand why she continued to break his heart over and over again. It was like every time they were in a good place in their relationship, she would pull stunts like this to break them up. He sat down on the couch and massaged his temples, trying to stop himself from getting emotional. He knew exactly why she always pulled away from their relationship, it just didn’t make sense to him.
“Sheila,” he patted the spot next to him, “please come here.” She looked at the broken facial expression of the only man she ever loved, and it broke her heart in two. She slowly walked over to him and sat down. She took his hands in hers and brought them to her lips for a kiss. Sheila sighed deeply before she began, “Baby, we’ve been through this before, I don’t want to take you through this with me, not again. Last time…” “I don’t care about last time,” Miles interrupted, “I only care about being with you for as long as I can.” Sheila looked up at Miles’ pleading face and decided to just let it go at the moment. He was the last person she ever wanted to upset, so she would make sure they ended the night on a pleasant tone. She smiled at him and cupped his face, “Okay, you win. Let’s go out back…” she paused to kiss him, “and look at the stars.” He sighed with relief that she dropped the subject and then smiled as an idea popped in his head. “I’ll go out back on one condition,” he smiled, wrapping his arms around her. “Oh, yea?” she smirked. “Let me guess, it has something to do with me getting in a bikini, right?” she arched her brow while turning to look at him. He shrugged, “Hey, a brotha has to try right?” he kissed her cheek and walked over to the kitchen as she walked to his room. He stood in front of their wine cabinet, trying to decide if he wanted the Sauvignon Blanc or the Vintage Port. “Hey baby,” he yelled down the hallway. “Yes?” she hollered back. “Dry or sweet?” After a few seconds went by, Sheila popped her head out of the room, giving him a knowing look. “Sweet,” she said simply and then disappeared back in the room. Miles grinned and pulled out the never been opened bottle of Vintage along with two wine glasses from the cabinet above. After he poured the two glasses, he made his way to his dimly lit backyard and started the jacuzzi. He eased down into the nice and steamy tub, waiting for Sheila to join him. He still felt a little uneasy about how the night started off, but he was just glad that Sheila dropped the topic. He hoped she would drop it forever, but he knew that was wishful thinking. “Getting started without me, I see,” Sheila stood in front of him with her hands on her hips. Miles completely forgot what he was thinking about as he stood there, staring at the gorgeous woman in front of him that he was blessed to call his. She stood there in a hot pink string bikini that barely covered her rear, daring Miles to take it off. “Are you just going to sit there with your mouth open, or are you going to help me in?” She asked, smiling at him. “Girl, forget this jacuzzi; let’s go back in that kitchen and cook something up,” he said with mischief in his eyes. Sheila swatted him away, playfully, “Nope, you got me back here already, now help me up.” She held out her hand so he could guide her up the steps. Once she was in the jacuzzi, Miles grabbed her around the waist. He held on for dear life and didn’t want to let her go. Sheila just laughed and took a sip from her wine glass. After a while, she grew silent and gazed at the stars. While she stared at them, he gazed at her, fearing they’d never have a moment like this again. CONTRACT Sheila was looking at the scans as if they would magically change the same scans that appeared two years ago. It’s like it instantly brought her back to that fateful day her relationship changed with Miles. October 15,2018 “I don’t understand,” Miles sputtered to the nurses. “She only fainted, I mean, we were working out, and she told me she hadn’t eaten earlier. It’s normal, right? Why are all these tests necessary?” “Sir, I’m going to need you to wait outside. Right now, we need to focus on the patient, one of the nurses will come and get you when we have an update.” Miles was shooed out of the room just 25
as confused and worried as he was when he rode with Sheila to the ambulance. It seemed like two hours had gone by before Miles had anyone come to check on him for an update. He was sitting there talking to himself, trying to figure out what could have happened when a nurse approached him. “Hi Miles, the patient is awake and has given us consent to let you know the status of her condition. Please follow me this way to her room.” The young nurse instructed. Condition? Miles was scratching his head, trying to figure out what was going on with his lady. When they entered the room, Sheila was hooked up to all kinds of machines, but when Miles’ eyes landed on her, her face displayed a beam so bright, all of Miles’ worries subsided. “Hey, you,” she cooed. Miles grabbed her hand, giving it a soft kiss. “Okay, doc, can you tell me what’s going on with my Sheila. Why all the technology?” He asked, looking around. The doctor cleared her throat before explaining, “Well, let me introduce myself, I’m Dr. Yvette Stevens, I’ve been Sheila’s doctor for five years now,” she said looking at Sheila who gave her a smile. “And I heard your concerns about her working out earlier without eating, and you’re right that would be normal for her to faint. But with her history, we just want to make sure we aren’t missing anything. We’re going over everything on our checklist to make sure we can send her back home with no concerns.” “I’m sorry, what history?” Dr. Stevens looked over to Sheila, who nodded her head, prompting her to continue. “Sheila has been diagnosed with Galentosis, it’s a very rare condition that comes and goes but can be very fatal if not caught at the right time. That’s why –” “Excuse me what?” Miles was looking dead at Sheila this time. “Um excuse me, Yvette, can we maybe get a little privacy?” Sheila asked, knowing this conversation was long overdue. Dr. Stevens gave her a reassuring smile and ushered the rest of the nurses out of the room. “What’s going on, Sheila? Where is all this coming from, how come you haven’t told me this before?” Miles wasn’t sure how to take the news that the doctor broke to him; in his mind, Sheila was perfectly healthy. Sheila began rubbing her arms fluidly, a habit she had picked up on when she didn’t want to talk about something. “Baby, listen, I’ve had this disease since I was five. It’s been a part of me for as long as I can remember, I’ve gotten used to its place in my life. I’ve watched this disease drive my parents crazy trying to control when and how I’d get my next flare-up, and let me tell you it doesn’t do anybody any good. So, I decided a long time ago that I’m going to live my life as I see fit. You and me we got lucky the first year we were together, it’s like this stupid illness seized to exist the moment I met you. Now it’s back rearing its ugly head, and all I want to do is protect you from it.” “Protect me?” Miles was pacing the room now. “Sheila, have you been listening to yourself; you’ve had a fatal disease since childhood, a disease you never felt comfortable telling me about, and you’re trying to protect me?” “I don’t want you to feel burdened to be with me. Sweetie, we’ve had such a beautiful time together I don’t want our relationship to be tainted with you taking care of me,” she reached out to take his hand, but he roughly pulled away. “Tainted. Burdened.” He stressed each word with malice as if it was painful to say. “Is this how you really feel about me? About our relationship? Cause the way you describing it, it’s like we just had a little fling.” Sheila could see her words were causing more harm than good to her lover, and that’s the last thing she wanted. This wasn’t how she envisioned telling Miles about her diagnosis would be at all. “You’re not listening.” “No, I can hear just fine. It sounds like you got this. Like you have had this for a while without me. So, why don’t I leave before I ruin the rest of this fantasy relationship for you.” He huffed, not giving her a second to react as he stormed out the room. Sheila put her hands to her face and quietly screamed. She wouldn’t allow the tears that started to form in the corner of her eyes to drop because she anticipated this outcome. What she didn’t understand is why he sounded so angry. In the past, when she told old boyfriends about her condition, they took it as a free pass out of dodge. They would barely leave her with any time to explain what it meant to have Galentosis. But Miles was different. “Of course he’s hurt, I practically told him I don’t trust him to handle this,” Sheila sighed, talking to herself out loud. Knock Knock.... To be continued in next issue
Crishanna Randle is a twenty-eight year old fiction writer residing in the Midwest. Her love for writing came in middle school when she would write short stories and share them with friends and family. Crishanna didn’t become serious about writing until January 2016 when she started writing the first draft to her very first novel that came out in August of 2018, titled Lily Unbloomed. She currently works as a Financial Counselor at a hospital full time while building her writing resume and creating more stories on the side. Crishanna looks forward to getting lost in more stories, making new worlds for her characters, and pursuing her purpose in storytelling Crishanna Randle Follow mE Buy Lilly Instagram 27
Broadlawns Medical Center Audiology FAQs Courtney Thayer, AuD Broadlawns Ear, Nose, and Throat Clinic What is the ear? There are three main parts of the ear: 1. The outer ear is the outside of the ear that we all think of when we say ear, but also includes the ear canal. 2. The middle ear is mucus lined, like your sinuses, and holds 3 of the tiniest bones in your body that push the sound into the inner ear. 3. The inner ear is where the sound is converted from a sound wave to electrical, nerve impulses that get sent to the brain for processing. What causes hearing loss? The main cause of hearing loss is the aging process. It can also be genetic, starting sooner in life. As we get older, things in our body slow down and it is no different with our ears. Hearing loss can be “sensorineural”, meaning permanent nerve damage. This is the most common type of hearing loss. Some people are born with hearing loss. Others have damage to the ear from exposure loud noises without proper hearing protection. Hearing loss is increasing for the younger population due to the use of ear buds at unsafe levels. For those with sensorineural hearing loss, hearing aids are the main form of treatment to give the ear back the sound that it is missing. Another type of hearing loss is called “conductive.” This type of hearing loss means that something is blocking the sound from getting into the inner ear. This can be things like excessive ear wax or fluid built up in the middle ear space. This type of hearing loss is typically reversible using either medication or surgery and the Audiologist would refer you to an ENT doctor for medical intervention. What is that ringing in my ears? This is called tinnitus and is typically a symptom of hearing loss. Tinnitus is permanent, but changes, typically in volume, throughout the day. It can present itself in many different sounds: crickets, ringing, buzzing, white noise, chirping etc. Most people find tinnitus annoying but can continue daily tasks, even with the ringing present. Others, need more assistance to reduce the severity of the tinnitus and may this with noise such as having a sound machine running in the background. Others with hearing loss need the treatment of hearing aids to alleviate the tinnitus. The tinnitus will not go away, but it can be managed. How do I know if a sound is too loud and I need hearing protection? Sounds louder than 75-80 dB HL can be damaging over time. Very loud exposures, like gunshots, can damage the ear with the first exposure. There are many sound level meter apps that are pretty accurate. I use “Soundprint” to identify sound levels in my everyday life to determine if hearing protection is warranted. Did you know that lawn mowers,
motorcycles, firearms, and other power tools are likely going to be loud enough that hearing protection is recommended? The best hearing protection for you is the one that you will wear - foam plugs, ear muffs, and custom hearing protection are all available for use. How do I know if I need a hearing test? 1. You are regularly asking people to repeat themselves. 2. There is a constant ringing or buzzing in your ears or your head. 3. You continue to need to turn the volume on electronics up. 4. You can hear people, but not quite understand what they are saying. 5. You struggle to hear with background noise present. 6. You have had exposure to loud noises, with and without hearing protection. It’s always a good idea to get a baseline hearing test because we don’t know what we cannot hear, if we cannot hear it. A baseline test can help your audiologist know if there have been large, sudden changes in hearing, or if it is the more typical, gradual change in hearing. I recommend getting a baseline of hearing when an individual turns 50, and sooner if you are struggling to hear. What will happen at my first appointment? 1. The audiologist will look in your ears. 2. A hearing test will be performed. It will take about 15 minutes. It’s just like the testing you have in school screenings, you listen for beeps and raise your hand. 3. The audiologist will be able to share the results with you at the appointment and discuss treatment options while listening to your needs for communication. 29 What to expect from hearing aids? Hearing aids are digital processors that take input from our environment, put different programming parameters on the signal, and send it out of the hearing aid then into the ear for you to hear. The audiologist will use your hearing test to prescribe your settings in the hearing aids. The cost of a hearing aid is determined by the technology and the computer chip inside the devices. You will discuss your needs with the audiologist to select the best option for you. Hearing aids cannot give you normal hearing, but they can increase your environment so that you can listen with a little less effort. Many hearing aids now have Bluetooth, direct connections to cell phones, making phone calls easier and listening to audiobooks a breeze. They are also rechargeable, decreasing the overall maintenance cost by not having to purchase hearing aid batteries or the annoyance of your hearing aid battery going out while you are out to dinner. As an audiologist, it is my job to be knowledgeable about different technologies available for patients so that I can help you navigate the world of hearing aids and the features accessible to you, all based off your communication needs. If you are experiencing any issues with your hearing, the Broadlawns ENT Clinic is here to help. From newborns to 100-year-olds, our team is fully equipped to provide expert evaluation and treatment to improve your quality of life. Located on the Broadlawns Main Campus, the Ear, Nose and Throat Clinic is open Monday through Friday from 7:30 am to 4:00 pm. Appointments may be scheduled by calling (515) -282-7750. All forms of insurance, including Medicaid and Medicare, are accepted.
By Terence Haynes We Still Here Still asking can I fly even though I was born with wings. I was born breathing but you leave me no room to breath. Socially distant long before covid you cross the street when you see me coming, like a prison guard was yelling in the background BLACKMAN WALKING! Took my place in my home and replace me with food stamps and section 8. Sectioning off my home like you did real estate redlining me from my realist state of being a husband and father to my family.
Calling me a brute beast because I seem to be more manly. It seems pretty evident by you coming for me in mobs i guess because one or two of you may not have been able to do the job. As long as we buck dance there doesn’t seem to be a problem, but as soon as we organize then comes the rumors that we plan to rob them...but can you really steal from a thief? My broad nose smells deception, my thick lips speaks the truth, my melinated skin activates 2am no knock search warrants and snipers on the roof. I am a threat by conception not because I broke a law but because when you looked in my eyes this is what you saw. Hidden figures, writing in hieroglyphics, speaking in tongues of every kindred and nation, discovering cures, being pure of heart, spiritually devote, just admit it you saw greatness and conspired to snuff that out, but God made me in every earthy hue, every color in the spectrum and every where on his green earth even in places you did not expect them. There we are a reminder that God has the final say and we not goin no where we’ll be here to carry you out on your final day. 31
This story was written and FATHER’S DAY: PERSPECTIVES ON FATHERHOOD Tears streamed down my face as I listened to the velvety-smooth voice of Luther Vandross as he beautifully delivered one of his best songs “Dance with My Father.” It was July, 2003 and the song had just been released in June. I could not stop crying as Luther crooned away on my CD player oblivious to the floodgate of emotions and tears that this musical piece had opened in my dimly-lit room far away in Lagos, Nigeria. The words of the song spoke to me like a sermon from the anointed lips of a consummate preacher speaking from a podium on a Sunday morning. You may be wondering why I would feel this way about a song, but this was not just a ‘song.’ It was a reflection from a man who had a relationship or bond with his father. From the lyrical content of this piece, one could tell that the father of the singer was greatly missed and had been loved immensely by the son. It is common place to hear songs about a mother or mothers, but there has been a limited body of musical compositions that discuss or explore the relationship between father and son. published in the June 2018 edition of The Urban Experience Magazine. We felt this was a fitting article to share with our readers as we celebrate Father’s Day 2021. It meant a lot to me in a significant way and for the reason that I had grown up without my father. Luther Vandross’ song made me realize what was missing in my growing up: the solid love, support and guidance of a father. In the course of my life, I have been blessed by fathers, men who influenced and impacted me in so many ways, yet I longed for that singular and biological paternal figure to look up to, make proud and be scolded by. I never had one. When my father died, I could not grieve for him as a son should. In the place of grief, I felt a debilitating bitterness and consuming anger. Anger for the missed conversations and questions that I never had the opportunity to ask my father. Today, I am father of two beautiful children and like many of the people I interviewed in this report, I am determined to be different from my father and to pour into my kids all that is good and wholesome and to spoil them with the love and affection that I never enjoyed as a child. The Miriam Webster Dictionary defines the word father as man who has begotten a child. Known
Photo: Matthew Henry from Burst as the male parent, being a father entails a lot of things and the bearer of this title wears many hats. Several decades ago, when patriarchy was the norm, fathers were the primary breadwinners of the house and leaders in the community. Growing up in Africa and based on my little recollection of my own father, fathers (whom we called “Papa” and not “dad “or “daddy”) were stern patriarchs, breadwinners, symbols of strength and stability and no-nonsense disciplinarians whose words were few and whose very presence evoked some kind of awe and reverence. Fatherhood, over the years, has evolved in many ways. The modern American father changes diapers, prepares meals, bathes the kids, takes them to medical appointments, ballet classes, soccer practice, football tournaments in addition to providing for and supporting the family. History has it that a young lady by the name of Sonora Dodd, who after listening to a sermon on Mother’s Day, came up with the idea of Father’s Day in 1910 to honor her widower father who raised six kids all by himself after the demise of her mother. According to history, the first Father’s Day was celebrated in Washington to honor men, such as Sonora’s father, who had stepped up to be there for their children as single parents. It was not until 1966 that the then president, Lyndon B. Johnson designated the third Sunday in June as Father’s Day and in 1972, President Nixon’s administration made it official. Today, retailers have highjacked the celebration with sales events tagged “Father’s Day Specials” to market their wares with little acknowledgement to its origin and significance. This piece is about fatherhood and what it means to be the male parent. The joys, the challenges and the rewards in a rapidly changing world where the roles of fathers have been redefined and may not entirely reflect what fatherhood meant in two to five decades ago. I spoke with some men in the Des Moines’ African American community to shed more light on the role of the father in the upbringing of the child and how this translates to the mold and character of these children later in life as adults as well as lessons learnt from their own fathers. 33
Reverend Roderick Bradley, Founder, Urban Experience Magazine “My father that I was raised under, was a great provider but struggled in the area of being a father. We knew that he loved us, but he had a way of showing it. Today his way of raising us would be thought as cruel and inhuman. The bottom-line is that we knew he loved us. He was very disciplined and there are somethings that as I was growing up I said that I would not do, yet I knew he loved his family, protected and provided for his family.” - Reverend Roderick Bradley. Dr. Clair Rudison Jr. Management Consultant. “A father is someone who is there and is doing his best for his family. Sometimes, fathers are not present, yet they are there spiritually and financially. A father is concerned about the upkeep and forming of their offspring. A father is concerned about more than just his household, but he’s also concerned about his community and that the community is safe.” - Clair Eugene Rudison Jr. Pastor Ricky Martin. Photo: Victor Ayara “When a young man grows up without a father, he does not have that blueprint or structure that shows him what fatherhood looks like and this could lead to shortcomings or shortfalls that could affect generations yet unborn.” - Pastor Ricky Martin Photo: Victor Ayara
Though he was born in California, Reverend Roderick Bradley, was raised in Iowa and still lives in Des Moines, Iowa, where he pastors a church and publishes the Urban Experience, the only publication in the state of Iowa that focuses on the African American community of the state. I began by asking Reverend Bradley about what it means to be a father and the role that the father is expected to play in the family. “I’ve always desired to be a good father and I work hard at being a good father,” said Bradley. “As a Christian, I try my best to follow what the Bible describes as a father and one thing I learned is that a father you ought to love your wife and automatically that love pours down to the children. I love my wife and my family and do all that I can to please them and to make them happy. None of my children would say that I have not sacrificed for them as a father,” Bradley added. Unlike his own father, Reverend Bradley displays affection freely and does not hold back his emotions when it comes to his children and wife. This could be attributed to the difference between the period when Roderick Bradley was a boy and now when it is okay for men to be vocal about their love for their children. In the fifties and sixties when Rodrick Bradley was a young child growing up, men boys and men were taught, erroneously too, that being affectionate was not a “manly” thing to do. “I think the challenge with my father was that he was so disciplined and regimented. That he really didn’t really get a chance to show love. My father was not an emotional person. He wasn’t a huggy kind of person. We always raised under the impression that men don’t cry, (he chuckles) but that’s not true! For me to cry, it was a sign of weakness. So, I said, when I grow up, I was going to be different. For my father, that was how he was raised by his own father and so he passed it down,” Reverend Bradley recalled of his father. True to his childhood promise to himself, Reverend Bradley is an affectionate father who showers his family with love and is not afraid to lose his “manliness” by telling them he loves them, a departure from norms and traditions of the past that were steeped in the ideals of exaggerated masculinity. He is a different kind of father. One thing was for sure, as Bradley recalls, his father did love him and his siblings, but it was not the kind of love that was expressed with words. “He was a great provider but struggled in the area of being a father. We knew that he loved us, but he had a way of showing it. Some of his punishments would be considered today as cruel and inhuman. The bottom-line is that we knew he loved us. He was very disciplined and there are somethings that as I was growing up I said that I would not do, yet I knew he loved his family, protected and provided for his family. One thing that I remember about my father is that he was a man of his word; when he said what he meant and if he said he was going to something, he was going to do it whether good or bad.,” said Bradley. A trait that Bradley cherishes most form his father is discipline and integrity. Citing the Biblical injunction that says, “spare the rod and spoil the child,” the reverend believes that fathers should not be afraid to correct their children and set them straight. “Discipline is very key, and we have lost it today. There has to be tough love. You have to pour out into your children with hope that they grow up to be responsible men and women in society,” he added. Clair Rudison is a scholar, a management consultant, a preacher and a respected leader in the African American Community in Iowa. A Texas native, he grew up in an equestrian environment where horse riding was both an enjoyed pastime and a rite of passage for young boys. Rudision’s father played the role of teacher or coach for his son in more ways than one. “My father taught me a lot about masculinity,” said Rudison. “He taught me how to hunt, ride a horse and fish,” Rudison said. 35
Perhaps the most significant lesson from his father that Rudison learned was his work ethic and punctuality. Rudison recalled that his father, who was a business owner, would not tolerate form of tardiness or indolence. “My father was a businessowner, he owned a furniture business and livestock. He taught me about the importance of being punctual. He also taught us about perseverance when things get tough,” Rudison said. Given the changing times and economic pressures, there have been more absent fathers now than say 50 years ago. The American Psychological Association in one of its publications stated that the love of a father helps children develop a sense of their place in the world, which in turn helps their social, emotional and cognitive development and functioning. The APA further explained that children who receive more love from their fathers are less likely to struggle with behavioral or substance abuse problems. “I am a father who was not always there a hundred per cent for my children because of different circumstances.,” said Rudison. This is the case for so many other fathers, who, unlike their own fathers or the ones before them are caught in the daily struggles of life or have had some unfortunate events in their lives that kept them away or apart from their children. For these children, like myself, who had to grow without a father who was present to guide them, they had to rely on other fathers or male figures to teach them about life’s struggles or provide some form of leadership in values, morals and character. They never knew or enjoyed the presence or love of father in the sense that a boy raised by their father and mother would. “My father was murdered when I was 11 months old, so I never grew up to know my biological father,” said Pastor Ricky Martin of Des Moines. The death of his father left Ricky Martin under the care of his Proud to be Game Changers. We give people the confidence to reach higher and achieve more. You can be the difference at a company that’s changing the game. Find out more at Athene.com/careers 25001 (06/21)
Phillip Ferguson, Painter, Entertainer and Consultant “I remember when I was younger, I didn’t know how to swim, I honestly I don’t know how to swim still. The day that my dad became my hero, I was floating on a device like a floatie. I was in a pool where the deep end was in the middle and on the side was the shallow end. The floatie alligator that I was on flipped over and I cried for help. I could only see people sitting around drinking champagne, and the music was loud. I didn’t feel like I could breathe. I thought I was going to drown and I kept screaming for help…...before I knew it, I heard a splash. I t was my dad! He had jumped in with his suit on. He pushed over to the side of the pool. Before anybody knew what was going on, it turned out that my dad could not swim either and someone had to use a pole to pull him to the side too.” – Phillip Ferguson mother and step-father, but it was never the same as having his father in his life. Though Martin is thankful for having a step-father, he learnt how to be a man by himself. Today, the father of two epitomizes everything an ideal father should be. “A father, for me, is someone who protects his family, leads his family and bears the burden first before putting that burden on his family,” Martin said. “When a young man grows up without a father, he does not have that blueprint or structure that shows him what fatherhood looks like and this could lead to shortcomings or shortfalls that could affect generations yet unborn,” Martin added. Ricky Martin sees that fact that he did not have his father in his life while growing up as one of the reason that he learned what not to do early in his life and he had to learn from watching other examples of good fathers around him. Besides death, incarceration of a father, being born to unmarried parents, or an irresponsible father the other issue which keeps children and their fathers apart is divorce or separation of the parents. The emotional pain and hurt of a father who cannot be in the lives of their children can only be imagined. Men who do not have the opportunity to watch their children grow, be there for them physically and emotionally, have to deal with not just the stress of their separation, but also the legal hurdles and sometimes drama, to have custody of the child or at least periodic visits. I spoke to a father who is currently in a drawn-out legal battle to be in the life of his daughter. One of such fathers currently fighting in court for the custody of his daughter is Phillip Ferguson. An artist and special events painter. Phillip makes people happy when he uses his artistic talents to paint couples at their weddings. But he is not a happy man himself right now. I interviewed Phillip who is out of state at the time of report over the phone about fatherhood. He had this to say about his most memorable experience with his own father: This event and others left an indelible imprint of what a father should be on the psyche of Ferguson who told me he will stop at nothing to be in the life of his little girl. For him, the very fact that his own father could put his life on the line to save him, is a huge lesson of sacrifice and love that only a loving father can demonstrate. Ferguson wants his child to grow up knowing that he did everything he could to love her and be there for her. “I want to prove to her that someone loves her unconditionally and would do anything to have her and also help her to see the right attributes in a future husband because I know that could be a hard pick in a world like this,” said Ferguson. For many fathers in Phillip Ferguson’s situation who are willing to be there for their children but are constrained by divorce, separation and legal hurdles, there are fears that they 37
may not be there to provide emotional support, monitor their children’s activities, provide moral leadership and authoritative discipline and setting age-appropriate expectation for their children. As we celebrate this year’s Father’s Day, it is important to lift fathers in prayers as the roles they play are varied and enormous in laying the social structures of what kind of societies we would love to live in. It is also instructive for men to live up to the expectations of themselves and their loved ones. Fathers can contribute to the well-being and security of their children by building healthy a relationship with their spouses to prevent separation and divorce which have a lasting effect on the future and destinies of their children. Even though we may not take everything from fathers before us, we can take the positive attributes shared by the men I spoke to in order to maintain a solid, positive and permanent presence in the lives of our children. HAPPY FATHER’S DAY!!! Victor Ayara, MSc, Communications CEO, Kulture Bridge Concepts
Press Release FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE RETHINK IOWA LLC LAUNCHES A WHOLE NEW WAY TO SHOP LOCAL THROUGH A NEW ONLY MARKETPLACE – www. RethinkIowa.ShopWhereILive.com IOWA - JUNE 2021 While state and local officials are betting on brick-and-mortar retail to fuel small business recovery and revive mainstreet shopping in Iowa, local entrepreneurs and non-profit leaders have partnered with SHOP WHERE I LIVE to launch the SHOP BLACK IOWA™ platform for historically disenfranchised and economically disadvantaged small businesses to cooperate in selling products and services online. “We must band together as a community to accelerate business growth and help our historical disenfranchised and economically disadvantaged small businesses recover from the recent Pandemic” Said Entrepreneur and Co-Founder of Rethink Iowa LLC, Matthew Gilbert. “For emerging small businesses, investing in an e-commerce storefront can be more cost effective and efficient than burdening the business and their family with a commercial lease.” “We greatly appreciate the kind grant from Iowa C.O.R.E. Inc., which provided seed funding for the development of the web-based platform and subsidized the initial costs for the first 100 eligible businesses that register sell their goods and services on the platform.” “Providing this platform free of charge to our members is one way Rethink Iowa LLC is helping businesses accelerate their recovery and future success. This platform provides a safe and convenient way for the community to support economically disadvantaged businesses from the comfort of their own homes, and choose curbside pickup, shipping, or even local delivery if offered by the small business vendor.” 39
OAKRIDGE NEIGHBORHOOD HOSTS BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY’S AT ICONIC TEA ROOM ~Funds Benefit Early Childhood Enrichment at Oak Academy~ DES MOINES, IA – After a hiatus in 2020 due to the Covid pandemic, Oakridge Neighborhood’s annual Breakfast at Tiffany’s event is back in 2021 at the iconic Tea Room July 18 from 11 am to 1 pm. The fundraiser includes a gourmet brunch; Bloody Mary, Tiffany Twist and Mimosa bar; a Tiffany-inspired candy buffet; and Tiffany & Co. gift raffle. A short program will include a fashion show by Jane’s Family Shop, Aimèe and Hal Wilson. All proceeds benefit Oakridge’s Oak Academy, which provides quality early education and preschool to an ethnically and culturally diverse group of children. Oak Academy prepares young learners to enter kindergarten on par with their peers. Tickets are $100 for adults and $50 for children 12 and under. They can be purchased here: https://one.bidpal. net/Bat2021/welcome For 50 years, Oakridge Neighborhood has created opportunities for thousands of children, adu lts and families to succeed and become financially independent. It provides a safe neighborhood of supportive housing plus essential programs and services. It is one of the most culturally diverse neighborhoods in Des Moines, with over 66 percent immigrants and refugees from over 23 countries that speak over 29 languages. Of the nearly 1,100 residents who reside on the Oakridge campus, 53 percent are children under the age of 18. Ninety-nine percent of Oakridge Neighborhood residents are low-income. For more information, visit https://oakridgeneighborhood.org/ ###
Let’s Support our Black Owned Businesses Bottle and Bottega James and Bridget Neely Wine & Painting https://www.bottleandbottega.com/des-moines/ This year The Urban Experience Magazine celebrates 5 years. This isn’t a list of all the Black owned businesses in our city. The businesses listed below have been either featured or supported the Urban Experience Magazine in the last five year. Put your business card in the Urban Experience Magazine for $25 a month for the first year. Reach out to us at: contactdsmurban@gmail.com for more details. Urban City Magazine Howell Dixon Magazine/Podcast https://urbancitymag.co/ Ruby B’s Catering Bradley Family Restaurant 515) 681-4028 https://www.facebook.com/ rubybskitchen/
Hip Hope, Inc Bo James https://hiphopeinc.wixsite.com/hiphopeinc Tranzitions Salon & Beauty Bar Ty Daye & Courtney Beauty Salon https://www.facebook.com/TranZitionsBeautySalon/ Roots to Branches Ricki King https://www.rootstobranchesgenealogy.com/ Black Women 4 Healthy Living Brandi Miller Health https://www.facebook.com/groups/ bw4hl/?ref=share MAV Nu Direction Calvetta Berry https://www.facebook.com/ma.vs.73 Iowa Juneteenth Observance Dwana Bradley www.iowajuneteenth.com Van Esther Vanessa Lewis www.vanesther.com Made Easley Advertising Ash Easley ww.madeeasley.com NAACP Des Moines Branch Kameron Middlebrooks https://www.naacpdesmoines.org/ NAACP Iowa/Nebraska Branch Betty Andrews www.iowanebraskanaacp.org SoulFit Zakiya English https://www.facebook.com/DsmSo www.imagezphotostudio.com (515) 223-6122 43
Angela Jackson’s bio Angela Jackson, Esq. is an Entrepreneur and owner of The Great Frame Up which is an Art Gallery and Custom Framing Business located in West Des Moines. She also is Senior Vice President of Diversity, Equity and Inclusion at Athene USA Corporation. Angela serves her community as Board Member of The West Des Moines Chamber, Des Moines Arts Festival, Cornerstone Family Church and an Honorary Board Member for Des Moines Performing Arts. She is a member of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc. and The Des Moines Chapter of the Links, Incorporated. Angela is a Thought Leader and alumni of Washington University School of Law and Duke University. Gary Lawson’s Bio Debra Carr Bio Debra Carr serves professionally and personally as a champion for diversity, inclusion, and equity. Uplifting women and girls to become the best version of themselves is foundational. Debra is Principal Consultant and owner of Carr and Associates and works full-time for Des Moines Public Schools consulting for building level administrators, faculty, and staff to achieve school improvement goals. Debra has received numerous awards and is a champion for her community in which she has served for many years. Gary Lawson is a freelance writer who focuses on various aspects of business and government. He earned a graduate degree in Government Administration, and an undergraduate degree in Business Administration with a duel concentration in Management and Marketing. He is a VietnamEra veteran who has served as a Commissioned Officer in the United States Army. In addition, he has taught business courses at Drake University and Des Moines Area Community College. Celeste Lawson’s bio Celeste Lawson is a freelance writer who focuses on various aspects of education and cultural diversity. She earned a graduate degree in Curriculum and Instruction, and an undergraduate degree in Elementary Education, with concentrations in English and Language Arts. In addition, she has more than 20 years of classroom experience with teaching students at the primary, secondary, and post-secondary levels. Marc Supreme’s bio Marc Supreme is the program director for the urban a/c radio station, Strictly Hip Hop 90.7FM, in Peoria, IL. He is also a freelance journalist and commentator, covering politics and entertainment. Twitter & IG: @marc_supreme Clubhouse: @marcsupreme
Terence G. Haynes is a Musician, Neo Renaissance Artisan, writer, 30-year career Chef and currently running for Omaha Nebraska City Council District 2 North Omaha. Lori A. Young Bio He is a community advocate and bridge builder, a motivational strategist/coach with a passion for people development and Diversity and inclusion champion. A strong faith and belief base in Christ that furnishes a wellgrounded ethical foundation. He has a team building approach to empowering individuals to believe in and think for themselves. He is a multi-faceted communicator, dedicated to making a positive difference in every life he touches. Bert Moody is a Photographer, an IT Consultant, and Web Designer for the Urban Experience Magazine. He has been with the magazine from its inception. He has been a Freelance Photographer in the Des Moines area since 1985, first with Esquire Photo Agency and now with Imagez Photo Studio (www. imagezphotostudio.com). He also is a longtime associate at Nationwide Insurance as is a part of their National Network of Black Associates. Bert volunteers for many activities in the community and is a Board member with The Des Moines Urban Experience. Bert is married with three grown children. Lori A. Young is a native of Des Moines and a graduate of Tech High School and Grand View University. Her professional experience lies in corporate internal and marketing communications. Currently she is self-employed on assignment with the non-profit organization, Just Voices Iowa, as a Communications Director and Project Manager. In her spare time, she’s a feature writer, artist, and community organizer/social activist fighting on issues such as racial, environmental, and economic justice for over 10 years. 45
Negus Sankofa Imhotep’s Bio Cleophus “Cleo” Franklin Jr.’s Bio Cleophus “Cleo” Franklin Jr.’s leadership expertise is globally recognized. His passion for designing robust business growth, brand strategies, and implementing innovative, disruptive business models have benefited many global businesses and industries. Franklin’s values and beliefs are centered on approaching difficult challenges with curiosity and a beginner’s mindset. He is a purpose-driven leader who embraces servant leadership and investing in the personal and professional development of the next generation of leaders. His leadership career spans over thirty years with John Deere, Case-New Holland, and Mahindra as a global executive. Franklin is a published author. His global leadership book Coffee with Cleo (coffeewithcleo.com) was launched in June 2020. His book highlights ten leadership lessons from his global business executive career. Through artful and engaging storytelling, it showcases how one can navigate challenges successfully in our ever-changing, fastpaced, and complex business world by using an innovative entrepreneurship mindset and proven framework to improve your livelihood, but more importantly, your life. Courageous exited a 13-year intimate partner relationship because she discovered it was steeped in multiple abuses, including psychological, sexual, and spiritual. This experience made her not only want to learn how and why it happened to her, but how she and other Black sisters could avoid it in the future. Her gift of converting personal life experiences into educational currency is well proven; however, this time she believes it has led her to develop what may be the most important work in her 9 years of curriculum design and delivery - Empowerment through the Arts™. Black trauma-informed therapists recommend it and Black female focus group participants are finding the program’s gains to be sustainable. Courageous has begun the work in the community that interacts with the Black female survivor as well, bringing tools that allow them to see the Black female victim-survivor’s needs and address them appropriately in her Awareness Education, Survivor Empowerment, and Community Support Training. She is thrilled to bring the work of Courageous Fire, LLC to the pages of the Urban Experience Magazine to keep growing the numbers of Black sisters that get the help they need. Stay Connected to Courageous: Website, Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube, Twitter Negus Sankofa Imhotep is the Academic & Workforce Coordinator at Urban Dreams and the Deferred Expulsion Case Manager for Des Moines Public Schools. In these roles, he has connected several of Central Iowa’s top employers with highly skilled untapped talent, assisted hundreds of marginalized central Iowans in securing gainful employment, and successfully advocated on behalf of more than 50 students who faced expulsion from the Des Moines Public School district. Negus is also a sought-after orator and community ally, having served as an Executive Board Member for the Iowa Human Rights Board, a past Chair and Commissioner of the Iowa Commission on the Status of African Americans. In 2015, Negus launched Rudison Consultancy Group, LLC to offer cultural community network advising and cultural competency training to agencies and organizations across the region. His commitment to educating emerging leaders is what led him to teaching positions at Hawkeye Community College and Joshua Christian Academy in 2013. Negus holds a Bachelor’s degree in Liberal Arts with a concentration in Political Science from Excelsior College, a Master’s degree in Public Administration from Norwich University, and is currently writing his dissertation for a Doctorate in Business Administration with a concentration in Human Resource Management from Northcentral University.
Calling for Submissions The Urban Experience Magazine 47
YOUR HEALTH IS OUR PRIMARY CONCERN With five primary care clinics, Broadlawns ensures that high-quality, affordable, healthcare is accessible to all in our community. CITYVILLE FAMILY MEDICINE 580 SW 9th Street, Ste 100 Des Moines, IA 50309 (515) 282-2489 FAMILY HEALTH CENTER 1761 Hickman Road Des Moines, IA 50314 (515) 282-2334 PRIMARY CARE CLINIC 1801 Hickman Road Des Moines, IA 50314 (515) 282-2273 DALLAS CENTER FAMILY MEDICINE 507 14th Street Dallas Center, IA 50063 (515) 992-3711 EAST UNIVERSITY FAMILY MEDICINE 2508 E. University Avenue Des Moines, IA 50317 (515) 282-3278 All forms of insurance accepted. Call to schedule your appointment today!
1 Publizr