Copyright © steve bee 2016
The thing about our universe is it's big; really big... But all the big stuff and all the small stuff (and all the places that look like they have no Stuff) are all made up of really, really small stuff; particles that themselves may not be made of stuff at all. Sometimes particles can get entangled; caught up with each other. It happens all the time. Once particles are entangled, even if they're separated in space what happens to one of them immediately affects the other no matter how far apart they are. It's spooky, but it's the way it is. This story is about two such particles that became entangled a long, long time ago back when the universe was opaque and was nothing more than a plasma soup.... ...at that time they were the other side of the surface of last scattering. now they're at opposite ends of the expanded and cooler universe, but they are still entangled.
One of the particles is part of the biggest scientific experiment ever performed in our universe - the quantum universal brain - an undertaking by the ctholho empire; the most intelligent beings ever to have evolved in spacetime... I can hardly ...we're believe it... .after all this time... finally firing up the universal brain! Yes! We'll be remembered forever! The other particle, however, is on earth. It forms part of the molecular structure of a flavonoid in a jalapeño pepper just about to be served up in a hot chilli sauce from a burger van in Romford market... You want I'll have a burger and chilli sauce please. hot chilli or super-hot chilli? Well, as I'm a super-hero I'll have the super-hot. Thanks. Yeah, whatever... enjoy!
He couldn't have expected that by ingesting the burger he would change the state of the entangled particle and its twin and thus cause the collapse of the universal brain project. Nor that he had, at the same time put our entire galaxy at risk of annihilation by the most powerful beings in the universe. I mean, you wouldn't, would you? It The has failed sire! What has failed? universal brain project... What!!? It was an entangled particle problem... Not again! Do we know where the particle is? Yes sire. Then Then you know the protocol - reduce the entire galaxy containing the particle to plasma! That won't be possible this time sire... isolate the solar system containing the particle and reduce that to plasma! Again sire that would be against protocol - we have people already established on the outer planets... Then do that. But do it quickly! ...it is a ...which water-rich galaxy we have been colonising for millennia. means though we could get a team to the problem planet to quickly reduce the local area to plasma.
A planet people on earth call Pluto (although they no longer call it a planet). We have a task to perform first though - a part of the We have orders to start our invasion of the blue planet at last! About time! It'll be great to get away from this freezing underground sea. land mass will need to be turned back to plasma. No problem. Yeah! The blue planet's so near the star the water will be warm there. Yeah - sounds like fun! I still can't That's the believe I was made redundant by the council... ...I mean, you'd think they'd keep a super-hero on the payroll even if the local budgets are Being cut. trouble these days - it seems the whole world's gone crazy. I'm still going to patrol the streets at night though...
...it makes local people feel more secure. Let's hurry home! Yeah - there are weirdos everywhere these days! And anyway - I could do with some exercise tonight... ...that burger I had earlier has given me indigestion. Wow! Did you see that?
I'm A cat - I can see a Did I see that? mouse half a mile away on a dark night... ...did I spot a massive ball of flame crash into a lake just a few yards away? Er, yes! There's a I think we should investigate! I think we should call the police. rowing boat over there - let's take it... ...whatever it was it landed right in the middle of the lake! I'm feeling seasick already...
Shoot! To be continued...
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