how it felt to hold a gun to your head with your finger on the trigger. I can say now that I will never do it again, because it felt horrible. It gave me an idea of how Conner felt, though. He must have felt execrable if holding a gun like that felt favorable. I’ve never been very religious, but I do believe there is something that comes after. Our entire lives can’t amount to just a casket and tombstone; at least not in my mind. I won’t be one of those people that say committing suicide is a sin, but I do believe we all have our number. When someone goes before theirs is up, and it happens so much, it’s like sending Heaven a bunch of angels that it wasn’t ready for. And please, please believe me when I say this: Heaven doesn’t need more angels. It really doesn’t. 38

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