TR UTHS W ***WARNING: DETAILS OF ABUSE IN THIS ARTICLE. MAY BE TRIGGERING. PLEASE USE SELF-CARE.*** by a fictitious Black man (Denzel)2 brothers? No. Unfortunately, according to BlackburnCenter.org 2020 article here are the staggering numbers3 : • More than 40% of all Black women experience some type of domestic violence (DV) within our lifetimes ▷ 53.8% of us experience psychological abuse ▷ 41.2% of us experience physical abuse • We are 2.5 times more likely to be murdered by men than our whyte female counterparts ▷ 92% of these criminals know their victim ▶ 56% of the 92% were committed by a former or current intimate partner ▶ Nearly all of the 92% were committed by a Black man against a Black woman After reading those statistics and reading the first 7 months’ articles this year, it can be overwhelming at this point. It may seem hopeless. However, the last 5 months of this year, starting with this month, you will see that is NOT the case! Yes, the trap is difficult to see, deep to fall into, but… THERE IS A WAY OUT! This month through the end of the year, we’re going to continue to look at Deja’s story and discover how to walk our Black sisters right on out of the trap of DV and the specific ways that it entangles us as Black women. HERE WE GO. Just as our sister, 40-year-old Deja, was dizzily swirling in the cycle of accusations, silent treatments, sexual coercion, elcome to the August edition of Courageous Truths, Beloved! You’ve stomached hearing the predatory exploits of the perpetrator of abuse against a fictitious Black woman (Deja)1 . Am I picking on our Black spiritual bullying, yelling outbursts, and what seemed like hundreds maybe even thousands of conflicting but emotionally intense apologies, moments of clarity, and tears (yes, he laid those on thick), Deja’s job had a women’s empowerment lunch ‘n learn. A woman from the Iowa Coalition Against Domestic Violence4 and a woman from Courageous Fire, LLC did a virtual presentation on: 1. Hidden yet common types of DV Black women face5 Courageous talked about: a. Verbal abuse b. Psychological abuse c. Sexual coercion within marriage d. Stalking, including digital e. Spiritual abuse f. Economic abuse g. Revenge porn h. Coercive control 2. The National Domestic Violence Hotline. Courageous talked about how they can: a. Confirm what domestic violence is b. The specific type(s) the person calling is dealing with c. Help them find up-to-date resources in their specific area for HELP d. Provide safety plan6 guidance 3. DV Advocates. The Coalition’s representative talked about how they can: a. Help with getting Crime Victim’s Compensation - financial support to access the community supports and/or financial support to get safety; for example, relocation, payment of lost wages, etc. b. Help with getting you and your children connected to local resources - filling out forms, finding daycare, tutors for your school age children, etc. 4. A book, “Domestic Violence, Assault on a Woman’s Worth”7 . Courageous talked about how it: a. Made it clear that even biblically, DV is not okay b. Made it clear that God scripturally does NOT expect women to live in abuse to please him c. Made it clear that men who truly love God and love their mates will NOT abuse them Deja’s soul flatlined as she listened. Her mind flitted from one question to the next? “Where has this information been?!” 9 .
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