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APRIL 5, 2024 POETRY estranged to your danger BLUE MOON TAILOR Groundcover contributor the year came the year that marked the year to increase stranger danger a lack of presence for that which was done impressions of steamy haunts ghosts formed of Catholic guilt sensations remained only a little less foggy than my amount of groggy roots buried under your weight a burden they'd be if I didn't pull them clean I'd never be clear a year past the year the year that came that marked my increased capacity for stranger danger this year from when we began your excitableness bursting at the seams fog self-inflicted this time our own means 404 error no memory computed dread bleeding the pit of my stomach bursting cysts of betrayal all settled there pit large as an underworld poisonous peach pit rare quicksand fear nothing could compare RaGE a naming of pain fingers pointed stiff denial on your end stiff as my backbone would be for years for years on my end I couldn't name stiff twice what I couldn't reconvene no "custody" battle joy for my whiskered critter nothing can erase the danger you estranged me from Is this all that I have left to give you? Just a facade of the person I was? I lie next to you as if we’re connecting, but truly my passions are gone. Hollow and damaged, that’s all that I know. This daily routine getting tired. I am running in circles attempting to hide it, my soul shrinking like it’s on fire. Wandering round, wandering til the end. There is no light at the end of my tunnel. People say they are there to help me if needed, but are deaf to my crying for comfort. Listen to the whispers that knock at my door, those cruel and continuous words. They speak ugly truths, but I caused them myself, I have damaged their viewing, their regard. Can I fix this? Am I able? Oh where to begin? Digging deeply into the depths. I am fragile, gritty, raw, and hardened. Craving for more than I expect. I continue, I move forward, this cycle goes on. I seek after what’s better, improved. I can not know what will come to me next, But I can face it head on, with my smile. GROUNDCOVER NEWS Untitled JULIE SCHEIER Groundcover contributor Today I will not hear your voice. Grief pounds my heart today. You held me to myself. Your Presence, far away And by my side Palpable, Breathing, Soft, Quiet Hearing your Beautiful Vision Inside me Part of me Fragmented EVA MOORE Groundcover contributor My rhythm for life is fading. My highlights are fewer it seems. The zest for life I used to have, is a crumbling manic machine. Since breaking me down I’ve grown louder. Just to drown out the noise in my head. I’m still listening to lies, I tell myself daily. Now the lies are all truths that I bled. Forever. I wrote this the day I learned my brother’s partner died. For Trish and Carl. 13 exp. 01/31/2025

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