BAR-B-QUE TURKEY: A RECIPE FOR SANTA John Alexander, VOICE Vendor WELL, HERE WE ARE AGAIN, and this year, as last year, I want to share another one of my favorite holiday recipes, only this time, I want to share some of my favorite childhood Christmas memories. It was the night before Christmas when all through our house, you couldn’t hear a mouse because of all the noise we were making. I mean we were playing instruments and singing carols and dancing merrily — but not a creature was cold because we knew how to dress for that time of year. One particular night, when I was about 4 or 5, I wanted to do something special for Santa, and then, the idea came to me. Instead of milk and cookies, I left Santa a bowl of snow cream (homemade ice cream made with snow). This was one of my father’s recipes. Instead of milk, I left Santa a tall, cold glass of pumpkin wine (another of my father’s recipes). (What? Do you really think I was upstairs, tucked in my bed fast asleep? No! I was hiding and watching for Santa like all little kids my age, all over the world do.) This went on every Christmas for the next few years. I was about 11 years old the night I met Santa. I had joined the Boy Scouts and was working on many merit badges. I had taken great interest in cooking. I learned from the Boy Scouts how to cook over campfires, while my mother taught me her cooking techniques in the kitchen. One of my favorite recipes was Bar-B-Que Turkey. So, on this particular night, I left Santa the usual snow cream and pumpkin wine, but I also left a big Bar-B-Que turkey leg. I was at my neighbor’s that night and realized it was getting late. I knew I’d better get home before Santa came. I rushed home and OH MY GOD! The doors were locked, and I couldn’t get in. Waking my parents was out of the question, so I climbed through a window. It was then I heard a voice. No, I didn’t hear the words “Ho, ho, ho.” Instead, the voice told me, “It’s a lot easier if you take the chimney!” It was him. It was Santa! I was shocked. (Where did he put that big sleigh?) So, I closed the window and my mouth. I walked over to Santa, and we introduced ourselves. Santa was very interested in the turkey leg and told me to promise him I would tell my mother what a great cook she was. I let him I would. I also told him that the food he was enjoying was my cooking. Santa was amazed and asked, “You mean, you know the recipe? Would you share it with me?” I told him, “Santa, I will write it down for you right now.” AND THIS IS WHAT I WROTE: “Get yourself a nice big turkey and prepare it the same way you do any turkey you cook — with stuffing and everything — the dressing made with breadcrumbs, cornbread, Stove Top stuffing, etc. (In my dressing, I like to add lemon juice, pepper, and a diced yellow onion.) “And don’t forget those delicious turkey legs, or drumsticks, as some people call them! “Roast the turkey at the usual temperature (duration will vary, based on the turkey’s size.) “When the turkey is roasted to perfection, you slice the turkey, carve it into slices about a quarter-inch thick and serve it traditional style.” And then, I told him how to make the turkey Bar-B-Que-style: “To make your turkey Bar-B-Que-style, you take the turkey legs and breast. Follow Steps 1 through 4 from the first part of the recipe. “Next, get your favorite homemade or store-bought Bar-B-Que sauce and a Bar-B-Que brush for the sauce. “Take those turkey legs and brush them with the Bar-B-Que sauce. Now, wrap those turkey legs in foil — firm, but not too tight. Slice the rest of the turkey into quarter-inch slices, and do the same thing with the turkey you’ve cut up. “Next, take the Bar-B-Que sauce and your Bar-B-Que brush and spread a thin layer of the sauce over the dressing. Place a cover over or wrap that part of the turkey firmly with foil, and place them on a heated grill. “Bake the turkey and dressing slowly until they come to a simmer. “Let the turkey cool down a bit, and now, it is ready to serve. “Santa, I have now shown you two styles of turkey and dressing to serve, along with all of your other favorites, like potato salad, cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes, pies, cakes, etc.” NOW, NOW, NOW, READERS! Let’s keep good thoughts about Santa. By sampling the food and having me write down my recipe for him, he was not getting lazy or loafing on the job. You see, a few years earlier, Santa and Rudolph had worked hard to figure out how they could deliver presents all over the world and still have the time to stop and leisurely spend time with anyone of their choosing. Who do you think was one of the lucky ones to be on that list? ME! By the time I met Santa, he and Rudolph had perfected their plan to deliver to everyone all over the world and were able to get to me last. You see, I lived in St. Paul, Minnesota. Santa was so happy because that year after everyone’s presents had been delivered on time, he still had time to visit my house. Then, he and his reindeer could leave Minnesota and hurry back home to the North Pole, where it was warm — well, much warmer than Minnesota. Santa returned home with a new recipe and sample dishes for Mrs. Clause, along with some pumpkin wine. SO NOW THAT YOU’VE READ MY STORY, remember there are two ways to Bar-B-Que turkey. One, you bake in your oven, covered with foil or an oven-proof lid, or, you can take those nice drumsticks and cook them right on the grill, Bar-B-Que style, which is the wa I moved away from Minnesota, sev a a and I haven’t seen Santa since. But w on e each other again when I buy me a hou chimney. And even though I haven’t him, I can tell you that sometimes on Christmas Eve, I hear in the distance, a loud HO, HO, HO! ■ 6 DENVER VOICE December 2022
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