The funeral took place the very next day, a small one, considering it had only been a family of the two of us. The sorrow within me was trapped - unable to escape in one form or another. I had on, a constant mask of bravery, but beneath it, I was disorientated - a mess overall. I just couldn’t bring myself to understand why. Maybe if I had known sooner… It was my fault and I’m sure of it. I must’ve snapped one day and that pushed him over the edge - quite literally. I attempt to listen to the sermon but decide to zone back out when I hear the same old words. I sigh. He had been more than that. More than someone to just disap pear without many people really knowing him. More than someone to receive general talk of how he was such a sweet boy. His angelic face swims before my eyes, his brown hair wispy in the wind and his pale green eyes silent as they keep ahold of all his secrets. As his face starts to ebb away in the wind, my eyes adjust to the scene that surrounds me, and I spot something. It provokes thought and I find myself lost in my own world again. The half-empty glass. It stands there so blatantly, it just has to be a sign. Though not easy, I work on flipping my way of thinking around. The glass is half-full. I re peat it, over and over, until it seems engraved in the depths of my mind. I imagine him peaceful, surrounded by stretches of fields and nature, sprouting wings and looking over us all. At least his will to leave this world had been fulfilled. The sorrow seems to be clawing its way up my throat, seek ing an outlet. I collapse onto the relative nearest to me as the tears stream down my face, acknowledg ing that the hole will never be full again.
34 Publizr Home