ThE BAllAd of fRAncIS fERpSTEIn, pART II: AdvEnTURES on MIlEx By The franzen Men: Justin, Matt and fred It was a long way from Halon, but Francis loves the new world, Laser Planet. His family is no longer a persecuted minority and his parents, the Ferpsteins, not dreaded outcasts. Francis’ father, Sal Ferpstein, quickly rose through the pedestrian human ranks to attain a superior level in footwear construction. He even ranks above the Cyborgs which is an unheard-of accomplishment. All the oppression on Halon molded Sal into a well-oiled podiatrist encapsulator. Laser Planet, formerly Earth, is big on selfgrowth and accomplishment. Carl Thasmian’s father, Carl Thasmian Sr., is a self-made rich man who recognizes and appreciates talent and ambition, both very evident in Sal. Carl Sr. had inherited Digitalis, a congenital foot disease causing loss of feeling in the ankles and feet. The disease is common on the new planet and balance had become a big issue for many. It is quite common to see Laser Planet citizens toppling over in cities. Sal quickly put all his knowledge and abilities to bear on solving the problem. After many trials, he came upon the solution, a gel filled insert that radiated intense rays at the afflicted areas. However, the gel is extremely expensive and only a few citizens can afford the luxury of stable mobility. Carl Sr. quickly heard of his saving grace and contacted Ferpstein for a consultation and fitting. He brought his son, another victim of the disease. Carl Sr. and Sal introduced their children and, throughout the fitting and training process, they became inseparable friends. Never is one seen without the other. The fathers also became fast friends. Like his father, Francis rose quickly through the Thasmian business ranks and became an integral ISSUe 6 part of the Thasmian “Weed” production. This weed was the number one export of Laser Planet as the entire galaxy thrives on the magic arnica. It’s also the keystone to the Thasmian wealth. Inseparable from Carl, Francis quickly adapted to the trappings of wealth and power. Carl is a business genius and Francis is a combat genius. They were polar opposites but were exactly what the other needed. Francis has a rare ability to excel in combat endeavors. Man-to-man holds are his specialty. He is undefeated and also puts his talents to use in the Thasmian security structure, relied upon to guard the Weed on a galactic level. His travels allowed for intergalactic combat against all species. Francis grew stronger and his ties to Carl remain strong. On a routine business trip, the men travel to Milex. Carl and Francis go knowing they will both stay busy doing what they do best. Carl focuses on locking down further expansion of Thasmian Corporations while Francis is there to fight the planet’s champion. Their goal is to establish financial and physical domination in one trip. Carl wastes no time and heads straight for the Capitol of Milex. He walks into this meeting knowing it is a sure thing and he’ll get everything he wants on his terms. Entering the room, he takes his seat on the other side of the table from the Prime Minister, Shuthu, and his advisors. Carl opens his briefcase and slides a contract across the table. Shuthu looks over each shoulder and visually confirms the fate of Milex with his advisors. One by one each nod, confirming what Carl anticipated. The Prime Minister grabs a pen and tries to steady his hand as he signs the contract. He knows what Thasmian does to planets and is afraid for his people. He has no choice in this matter, though. Francis gives no choice in his work on Milex either, coming face-to-face against six armed Thargs. The Milexian beasts are twice the size of the most mean men on Laser Planet with three times the strength. Their teeth puncture through their lips and resemble a pit of spikes with a tongue. Luckily for Francis he’s not most men. At six-feet-eight-inches, he was not dwarfed like most humans were by the Tharg. The torches were lit and both Francis and the Thargs collide in the middle of a dirt arena. Francis makes quick work of his opponents. He rips off the lower arm of one and quickly follows up with a death grip. The Tharg’s attempt to free itself is futile. The more it struggles, the deeper Francis’ death grip digs in. With its head between the bicep and forearm of Earth’s reigning champion, the Tharg uses its jagged teeth and bites into Francis. Without blinking, Francis strengthens his death grip and rips the Tharg’s head straight from its body. Its nerves snap like rubber bands as blood fountains out of the creature like one of Laser Planet’s geysers. The other five Thargs retreat in fear and the crowd goes wild. Francis defeats their champion, holding the Tharg’s head up high. At no point could Carl Sr. and Sal anticipate that their sons would be the men they are today. Their ability to conquer a planet in an afternoon is unheard-of and is what makes these two men the forces they are. Milex isn’t the first planet they have done this to. And Milex is definitely not the last planet. The thrill of conquering is what makes these men get up in the morning. to be continued.… 5
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